Command Command and Command!

A kid’s day is full of commands alone. Don’t do this, don’t do that, don’t shout, don’t take it, Keep this this properly, Clean up your mess and so on and on and on.

Just imagine about your work in office. Will you like it to do it if you keep getting orders alone? We know that the job is important for us as we have to take care of ourselves and our family. This job might be the only source for it as well. However if we are getting only orders at our working place, we will just do it for the sake of doing. The kind of effectiveness and result that is supposed to be there will not come because our work is ‘fear based’.

Fear of losing the job or getting a salary cut or ultimately fear of not getting promotion will be the base of us to do that job. Till when? I will say, ‘till we get a better opportunity.’ Soon we get one, we will be the first one to leave the job and go.

It is the same thing with kids as well. The more orders you give, them the more rebel they will become. They won’t feel comfortable in doing what they say and by the time they reach their puberty, they will stop listening to you.

This is one of the reasons I asked you a question in one of my previous posts, ‘do you need an obedient child or a cooperative child?

When your boss approach you with a request of cooperation for work, and you feel your service is been counted, you will be more than happy to do work along. Nothing is different with your kid. Than ordering you request your kid and let them work along, they will show more cooperation and eventually you will see that the moment you tell them to do something, they will do it.

You just need to bring three small changes in you, replace ‘can you’ or ‘could you’ with ‘will you ‘or ‘would you’. Can sounds more demanding where in will is more of request. Second one is, use more ‘please’ when you want them to do something and the third and most important change is, ‘stay calm and respond calmly’. Give yourself at least a weeks’ time to practice these and you will soon see your kid responding to you in a positive manner.

Again my question remains the same, do you want you kid to be obedient or cooperative?

Happy parenting, positive parenting!