Comma, comma, dash, dash, does it really matter.

Focus on what matters, be kind and basically don't be that dick head...

The most dick head thing someone can and has done to me while training is pointing out a grammar/spelling mistake. Then apologising (passive-aggressive) to everyone saying "it really bugs/pisses me off when seeing grammar or spelling mistakes, generally in life." What a lovely way to say; look at me everyone I am so smart, funny and I haven't had to worry about a thing in life (generally), except where a comma goes. I know where everyone really wanted to stick that comma.

When someone does that (pointing out the mistake, not sticking a comma up...), I'll think, you look down on and judge people, people that might not have had the education or upbringing you have. And adding my own judgement, the words insecure, privileged and rude come to mind. I'm a 1st gen Indian, from a working-class family. And growing up, I had more to worry about than understanding why you can't start a sentence with because, but or and. But that's another story. To be fair when I've felt some of the above things while standing in front of 14 people, I've taken a breath and said, I'm really sorry, I should've said this at the start of the session. I have dyslexia, and if anything is unclear just tell me, I will take my time with the flip charting and read out what I write. The slides will have some errors, I just can't see them sometimes, and the computer can miss them. That shuts Mr clever clogs right up.

Yep, I take a pinch of joy from that. Maybe the same joy some people feel at pointing a mistake out like that. I don't want to be doing that, and the "joy" doesn't last long, and I'm just as red-faced. Like seriously, the question to you all, does it matters if you get the gist and the actual content/meaning is good? An email after the session or a chat at lunch would be kind and taken as well-intentioned. And it might lead a learning experience for me.  Just being told I got it's wrong isn't helpful. An old boss who found my dyslexia, let's say hard, in an attempt to support and help me would pick things apart as feedback, basically tell me what to change. When I asked for specific feedback; "what is the impact of xyz on the reader", I would be told, "the rules of grammar dictate this, therefore, is easy to read." So helpful thanks! That whole experience nearly flattened my confidence and self-worth, and I'm still none the wiser.

I think there's lots of judgment out there on typo's, grammar and what people write. Yes, people have spellcheck, and yes spellcheck can be crap. Grammarly is a bit better, and even after buying the premium version, it will let you down. For some reason, when I read over things, they just make sense, and I can't see what the problem is and this is a small part of my dyslexia. Here's a shocker for you, dyslexia is more than spelling and grammar. Yep, mic drop moment. Go research and read up on it, if you have anyone that's reporting into you it, it'll mean the world to them.  And don't be a douchy boss. What I will share is that it gives you superpowers: problem-solving, EQ, relationship building, abstract thinking, out of the box thinking, curiosity, big picture thinking are just a few. Help them focus on that and find ways around the other stuff. Just because you were taught something or it was drummed into you, doesn't make it relevant now. 

I love my superpowers and want to keep using them. I also love language and words, but dyslexia and my experiences have made me feel I have to hide this and that I'll never be good at it. I've felt undeserving of writing how I think (untamed structure bit like my lock-down hair) and experimenting with different styles because of the fear of judgement.  I don't feel that right now. You've read my first article and hopefully the start of an affair with words, language and a break from my go-to male, pale and stale writing. 

Maybe I will write some more perhaps I won't, in the meantime focus on what matters, be kind and basically don't be that dick head.

Thank you for reading 

Minesh

Mad genius in hiding.