Comfluencial- A synergy of Command and Influence
Swarna Kalyan
Purpose-Driven Leadership | Transforming Customer Experiences | Nonprofit Organization leadership | Unlocking Opportunities | Senior Manager in Financial Services & Insurance|
When I was in school, I was so fascinated by the Armed forces, that when my school offered NCC (National Cadet Corp) as an ECA, I was the first one to signup. I enjoyed the various leadership camps, the training and also had the opportunity to lead the NCC Battalion during the Republic day parades. During rehearsals, I was required to learn to use my voice effectively to get the attention of the battalion, making sure we all march in sync. Our Battalion won the best team during the parade. NCC training laid the foundation of my leadership journey. I am sure, we see that in many military leaders where it is my way or the highway. Commanding type of leadership is synonymous to strength, power and masculinity.
Early in my first job, I realized the commanding leadership may get results, but that could not be the best way to lead a team. I also realized that making leadership decision simply from a pragmatic standpoint was not my cup of tea, I knew that when dealing with a team it is important to consider unseen emotions and unexpected variables. I had to move from the space of commanding to influencing. Influencing is being inclusive, being passionate and flexible. However, being flexible was always associated to me being weak or emotional. I struggled to find a space that was firm but still flexible. Not just at work but at home too, as a parent, as a daughter, and as a spouse. I had stepped out of the leadership journey because of this struggle.
As William Wordsworth's quotes "The Child is the father of man", I was taking up responsibilities in my community projects, school PTA, my music class and the list continued. With time, I realized that I could confidently manage teams, projects effectively by balancing the commanding and influencing nature. I realized, that I could be a woman with a heart and lead with my head.
I recently attended a leadership talk by Linda Patten and on this word, that she coined "Comfluencial Leader". I could connect with her story of her leadership journey and see parallels on how my personal leadership journey has molded. She was from the military and later moved to become an entrepreneur. her success has been the ability to find the synergy between 'Commanding' and 'Influencing'.