Come to Me and Find Rest: A Leader’s Journey

As I sit, sipping my morning coffee and gazing out of the rounded front windows of my home, I am enveloped in a serene moment of reflection. The tranquility of this instant is a powerful reminder: in our roles as leaders, educators, philosophers, and visionaries, there is no need to rush.

This week, I want to delve into the importance of rest and the power of absorbing the greatness in the work we do. Recently, I had the privilege of accompanying a clinical leader from one of the clinics I helped establish at the Martin Luther King Jr. Behavioral Health Center in Watts, California. We visited TDD Supportive Living, an organization founded by one of my mentees, Deborah Roberson . TDD provides housing for recently released individuals from jail or prison, LGBTQ+ Angelenos, and veterans. During a tour of her 30-bed facility, funded through her tireless efforts and personal sacrifices, I was reminded of the importance of acknowledging and embracing the goodness shared with us. Ms. Deborah moved our tour group to tears as she recounted stories of her daughters, the namesakes of her organization, and how my mentorship became a cornerstone for her mission.

Despite my inclination to deflect praise, I realized that my discomfort in accepting thanks masked a deeper issue—a toxic pattern of relentless doing without reflection or rest. Our collaboration felt minimal on my part: a few coaching sessions, grant writing assistance, and motivational support. Yet, Ms. Deborah's achievements stand as a testament to the profound impact of nurturing and believing in someone's dream.

Similarly, a nursing instructor at Cal State Northridge expressed gratitude for my biannual talks on social determinants of health and racial health disparities, emphasizing their significance to her students. This acknowledgment, which I allowed myself to absorb, was a profound and beautiful experience. As servant leaders, we often sacrifice ourselves for the greater good. We will continue this path, but it is equally important to accept and celebrate our accomplishments. The words of Matthew capture this sentiment perfectly: "Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things."

We deserve rest. We need to unplug, savor moments in the sunlight, enjoy the melodies of an Anita Baker record, and revel in the greatness of our contributions. In doing so, we fortify our spirits and prepare ourselves for the journey ahead. Here are a few unique and lesser-known practical steps to help you reflect, receive praise well, and rest:

• Create a "Praise Journal": Dedicate a notebook to jot down any compliments, acknowledgments, or positive feedback you receive. Reflect on these entries weekly to remind yourself of your impact and worth.
• Conduct a Personal Debrief: After completing a significant project or milestone, set aside time for a personal debrief. Write down what went well, what you learned, and how it made you feel. This practice helps you internalize your achievements and learn from them.
• Engage in Sensory Meditation: Take 10 minutes each day to sit quietly and focus on the sensory experiences around you—sounds, smells, sights, textures. This form of meditation can help you ground yourself in the present moment and recharge your mind and body.
• Set Up a "Praise Circle": Regularly meet with a small group of trusted colleagues or friends where each person shares recent accomplishments and receives positive feedback from the group. This practice can enhance your ability to accept praise and foster a supportive community.
• Implement Micro-Rests: Throughout your day, take short, intentional breaks to close your eyes, breathe deeply, and let go of any tension. These micro-rests can significantly reduce stress and improve overall well-being.
• Designate a "Rest Ritual": Develop a pre-sleep routine that signals your body and mind to wind down. This could include activities like reading, listening to calming music, or practicing gentle yoga. Consistency in this ritual can improve the quality of your rest.

I am thrilled to announce that I will be launching my YouTube series on philosophy for a new generation within the next month. Stay tuned for a journey into profound ideas and transformative discussions.

Until then, remember to rest and reflect, to soak in the praise, and to continue moving forward with grace. Be Strong. Be Reflective. Be Rested.

Be Healed.

Dr. Golden