Colliding Worlds: Connecting on Social Media with Professional Acquaintances

Thanks to social media - lines have never been more blurred.

As we’ve evolved, our first world problems have become more pressing, increasingly urgent and extremely serious - should I become connected on Facebook with a new client? How about my boss? Do I want to be connected on LinkedIn with someone who just interviewed me for a job? How about a service provider? 

Now you’re thinking why would anyone be naive enough to send a brand-new client a Facebook request. How utterly unprofessional. Yes of course, but what if it’s the other way around? Do you want to offend them by not accepting it?

What if your new client is now following you on Instagram? This isn't what you signed up for.

While no one actually signs on the dotted line, connecting with someone on social media means entering into a social contract of sorts whereby you gain insight into their life and in return they gain insight into yours. 

Sure there is the ability to tweak the privacy settings of your posts but how many people actually do this? About the same that read the Terms of Service.

 You may not care about their personal life, but do you want them gaining access to yours? Worse, do you want your posts becoming fodder for conversation

See you're dating someone new.

You really like Hamilton. I never got into it. 

Timing is everything. Some people don’t think twice about sending a request or following someone as soon as they’ve met and this is what puts people offside. 

If online is meant to mirror the offline, shouldn’t you get to know each other until reaching out on social media? They don't know you - barely professionally and not at all as a person.

In this day and age of instant gratification, there’s a thought by some that being connected on social media is the easiest way to get to know someone - instead of spending time hanging, you scroll through their posts. Social media shouldn’t be the foundation upon which a new relationship is built. 

If the connection request is not accepted this should be respected. When we have less and less privacy, there are people who want their personal and professional lives to be separated.

For people who like to do all they can to prevent their worlds colliding, having their personal and professional lives collide is a complete anathema.

Be sensitive when sending a friend request or following someone especially if you are the person who connects with anyone and everyone - even though you have the best of intentions, you may be creating a situation that resembles a Curb Your Enthusiasm episode. 

If you are now friends/following each other, now you have to negotiate the hurdle of whether or not to engage with the posts and how to do so. 

This is where many have it all back to front. Your focus should be on the offline relationship - building a genuine relationship that is built on a platform of spending time together and getting to know each other as opposed to one built on likes and lolz. 

Nobody has time for this. So it’s easier to click friend than listen. But there shouldn’t be a rush to be connected on social media. The journey of getting to know someone shouldn’t be seen as a chore, but rather something to be savored.

Then again if you’re not sure how to deal with an awkward friend/connection request that’s sent to you. Accept it and give the person the feeling of goodwill that comes with it. Then in 2-3 weeks, cancel the friendship. Most likely they won’t notice and if they do bring it up, respond: "You must have deleted me by accident." ??

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