Collaboration Over Entitlement: Why Desperation Repels and Authenticity Wins

Did you know that over 85% of business opportunities come from networking, but only a fraction result in paid referral agreements?

Referral agreements are powerful when done right—they reward meaningful connections and foster lasting relationships. But when entitlement takes over, things fall apart.

Here’s what I’ve noticed: There’s a world of difference between saying, “I’ll set up a valuable connection for you and we’ll agree on a referral fee,” versus simply throwing two names together and expecting compensation.

Yet, so often, I see people trying to monetize every introduction—even when no real effort or agreement was made.

Here’s the harsh reality: Demanding payment for casual intros doesn’t make you look strategic; it makes you look desperate. And desperation isn’t a great look in business.

In fact, studies show that collaborative energy is a top trait of successful leaders, while transactional attitudes tend to limit long-term potential. People can sense when someone’s energy is all about what they can take, and it’s a massive turn-off.

The truth is, this kind of “money-hungry” behavior repels opportunities instead of attracting them. Collaboration happens when trust, authenticity, and value align—not when there’s a whiff of neediness.

My rule of thumb: If I’ve made a clear effort to set up a meaningful connection that creates synergy, I’m happy to accept a referral fee. But if someone expects me to pay for a casual introduction with no context, it’s an automatic no.

Because collaboration isn’t a one-way street. It’s a shared journey built on mutual respect and value creation.

So, to those who approach connections with a “what’s in it for me” mindset—know this: It’s not just about the money. It’s about the energy you bring to the table. And entitlement is never the right energy.

Let’s normalize collaboration over desperation. Value over neediness. Trust over transactions.

What’s your take? Let’s start a real conversation about why how we ask matters just as much as what we ask for.