Coercive Control: The Invisible Scar

Domestic violence often conjures images of bruises and broken bones, yet some of its most insidious wounds leave no visible trace. Coercive control—a calculated pattern of intimidation, isolation, and emotional dominance—operates silently, eroding an individual's autonomy, identity, and sense of safety. The unseen cage traps individuals in toxic relationships and leaves scars long after the escape.

The Nature of Coercive Control: A Slow, Devastating Erosion

Unlike physical violence, coercive control is subtle and incremental. It thrives in manipulation, constant surveillance, isolation from family and friends, financial dominance, and threats of harm. Victims may hear phrases like:

• "Who are you texting? Let me see your phone."
• "You don't need to work; I'll handle the money."
• "If you leave, you'll lose everything."

At first, these behaviors might seem caring, even protective, but they escalate into a relentless loss of freedom. Over time, the victim becomes dependent, questioning their judgment and self-worth.

Psychologist Evan Stark coined the term "coercive control" and called it a liberty crime—an ongoing attack on a victim's dignity and autonomy. Unlike a single act of violence, it's the cumulative weight of control that strips away identity and free will.

Why It Matters: The Unseen Epidemic

In Illinois alone, countless individuals—predominantly women—are subjected to coercive control without realizing its abuse. Because it lacks visible markers, coercive control often goes unreported and unaddressed until it escalates into physical violence. Research shows:

• Victims of coercive control are five times more likely to experience severe physical harm later in the relationship.
• A study in the Journal of Interpersonal Violence found that coercive control correlates strongly with depression, anxiety, PTSD, and suicidal ideation in victims.
• Furthermore, 85% of women in abusive relationships report experiencing coercive control.

Coercive Control and the Law

The international community has made progress. Countries like the UK and Australia have criminalized coercive control, recognizing it as a standalone offense. While some states in the U.S. are following suit, Illinois must take steps to criminalize coercive control to protect victims before the abuse escalates to physical harm.

Breaking the Chains: Signs of Coercive Control

Knowledge is power. Understanding coercive control is the first step to breaking free. Here are key signs:

1. Gaslighting: Making you feel confused, manipulating your emotions, encouraging self-doubt, and making you feel like you’re going crazy.
2. Stalking: Being followed or feeling like your partner knows what you are doing and where you are at all times.
3. Financial Abuse: Limiting your access and controlling how you spend your money.
4. Harassment: Aggressive pressure or intimidation, constant calling or messaging you.
5. Isolation: Being stopped from seeing family or friends and made to be dependent on your partner.
6. Technological abuse: Viewing your text messages, emails, and social media without your consent, checking your phone, and controlling your access.
7. Blaming: Being made to feel responsible, at fault, and wrong.
8. Degrading: Being put down, publicly humiliated, disrespected, and having your secrets used against you.
9. Interrogation: Being questioned constantly and told that you are lying.
10. Threatening: Threats to kill, hurt, or ruin the life of you, themselves, friends, family, or pets.

Empowering Change: Hope for the Future

Breaking free from coercive control is not easy, but it's possible. Survivors who find their voice and reclaim their autonomy ignite a chain of hope for others still trapped.

Illinois has the power to lead by example:

1. Legislation: Criminalize coercive control to offer protection and justice for survivors/victims.
2. Education: Train law enforcement, judges, and communities to recognize coercive control.
3. Support Systems: Expand trauma-informed therapy and programs to help survivors rebuild their lives.

When survivors of coercive control speak up, they not only shatter their silence—they shine a light for others to follow. Their courage disrupts cycles of harm and lays the groundwork for systemic change.

A Call to Action: Shatter the Silence

We must unmask coercive control, amplify awareness, and create a world where everyone's autonomy remains intact.

Coercive control thrives in secrecy—it's time to shatter that silence.

References

1. Home Office. (2015). Statutory guidance framework: Controlling or coercive behavior in an intimate or family relationship. United Kingdom Government. Retrieved from https://www.gov.uk/government/publications.
2. Journal of Interpersonal Violence. (n.d.). Coercive control and its psychological impacts. Journal of Interpersonal Violence, 20(3), 456-479. doi:10.1177/0886260515597450.
3. Stark, E. (2007). Coercive control: How men entrap women in personal life. New York, NY: Oxford University Press.
4. United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime. (2021). Gender-based violence and coercive control: An emerging challenge. Retrieved from https://www.unodc.org.
5. Women's Aid. (2022). The impact of coercive control on survivors: A report of findings. Retrieved from https://www.womensaid.org.uk.