Coda: End of the Road for the Curse of the Colonel

Under the wide and starry sky,? ? Dig the grave and let me lie. Glad did I live and gladly die,? ? And I laid me down with a will. This be the verse you grave for me:? ? Here he lies where he longed to be; Home is the sailor, home from sea,? ? And the hunter home from the hill. - Requiem by Robert Louis Stevenson

In October 2023, the Hanshin Tigers of the Central League of Nippon Professional Baseball expunged a 38-year curse. See "The Curse of the Colonel Finally Lifted!"

In brief, fans of the Hanshin Tigers, jubilant because their team had won the Central League Pennant (not the Japan Series as is often reported), that they gathered by the fetid, slimy, polluted, foul-smelling Dotonbori river/canal in one of the most popular entertainment districts in Osaka. Fans connected somehow to players on the triumphant Tigers team took turns jumping into the canal from the Ebisu Bridge. When they came to team hero Randy Bass, a former major-leaguer born in Oklahoma, there was no one in the throng to represent Bass, so they stole a life-sized statue of Colonel Sanders from a nearby KFC and threw it in the canal. The statue sank to the bottom and was lost in the muck.

After that, 38 years of almost uninterrupted disappointment plagued Hanshin fans. The legend grew that Hanshin's extended troubles were the Curse of Colonel Sanders. Until the statue could be found, Hanshin would not win again, was the refrain. Regardless of the causality, Hanshing finished in the bottom half of the standings for 15 of the next 17 seasons, ten times finishing dead last.

Then, in 2009, workers in the canal discovered what they first thought was a barrel. They were horrified to believe it was a corpse before. Finally, someone (likely a Hanshin fan) identified it as Colonel Harland Sanders' statue. It was another 14 years before Hanshin could claim victory in the Japan Series, but that having been finally accomplished, Colonel Sanders' final role on earth was fulfilled.

The fiberglass icon had severely deteriorated over the years at the bottom of the canal, and its many years of being re-exposed to air had only accelerated its deterioration. Therefore, on March 8, in a quiet ceremony, the Colonel was blessed by a Shinto priest and then permanently retired to the great fast-food chicken joint in the sky. The final meal served at the funeral was sake and -of course- fried chicken, served by KFC Japan president, Takayuki Hanji.

They waited until March 19th to announce the Colonel's final demise. A KFC rep is quoted as saying, "This departure has been a deeply moving event. It has helped boost the company's brand for many years. It had a beloved presence in the hearts of fans and media alike. I want to express my thanks for its contributions to improving the brand's image, as its smile remained unchanged when it was discovered in March 2009. Welcome back home, Colonel."

Rest easy, Harland. The Long Strange Ride is finally over.