Coaching the superstar: the problem with alpha personality types

What adjectives come to mind when you think of a high flier? Confident, whip-smart, ambitious, resilient, hard-working, charming? Golden alphas tick all these boxes. These are your prize-winners, your top talent; you encourage and reward them. They learn how to command the spotlight, take credit and drive themselves forward.

Over time, if over-used and without constructive feedback, these great strengths can develop a dark side for the people around them. Confidence turns into arrogance, their direct communication style becomes downright domineering, and intense drive makes them impatient with more cautious colleagues. 

On the way up superstars are rarely called out on their blind spots. They are too good at delivering results and they make the people above them look good.   A blind eye is turned to the collateral damage they cause to their ‘over-sensitive’ colleagues. And let’s face it, whilst many of us grapple with imposter syndrome, isn’t it refreshing to see such raw self-belief and people who ‘get things done’, even if their sharp elbows are a bit bruising?  

These natural leaders can’t actually lead

Alphas inevitably get promoted. They are comfortable with being in charge, often with targets others would find overwhelming. Now the cracks begin to show. They have to rely on advanced people skills rather than flawless execution and solo decision making. It’s not about them anymore. They’ve never learnt to listen, to bring people with them, or to engender trust. They dole out harsh criticism and drive their teams as relentlessly as they push themselves. They generate fear and with it a dangerous culture of compliance: they don't want to hear alternative opinions.

If they manage to keep climbing, they’ll certainly hit the skids in cross-functional leadership with direct reports in roles that they haven’t fulfilled themselves. They have to let go of having all the answers. Feeling vulnerable, they over-compensate with busy calendars and micro-management.

How do you nip this behaviour in the bud?

If you can’t see it, you can’t be it. The leadership of an organisation defines the culture. If shadow-alpha behaviours like borderline aggressiveness, dubious ethics in the pursuit of goals, lack of curiosity (because they know it all), and even stealing credit are tacitly encouraged, then that’s how other people will behave if they choose to stick around. It’s hugely damaging. 

Encourage confidence, but focus on developing high performing teams, not star individuals at the expense of their less forceful colleagues. If you need these solo fliers to bring in the numbers, then push them to a lone spot on the organisation chart until they learn to manage their egos and dial up their ‘soft power’. 

Use meetings to show publicly that alpha behaviour isn’t tolerated: don’t let people talk over others or dominate the agenda. Encourage other people to take responsibility too and don’t let them assume that being cocksure is a prerequisite for leadership. Assign mentors with the behaviours and values you want to replicate. Encourage vulnerability and let people learn from failure. 

Feedback exercises usually stop alphas in their tracks. At heart, they just want to be recognised for doing a brilliant job.  Redirect their competitive spirit into winning awards for being the most inspirational, generous-spirited colleague and manager instead. 

Next steps

Know any alphas? I’d love to hear from you. 

Coach:  Here’s information about my coaching programme if you need help with the alphas in your organisation or the people who work with them.