Coaching managers to coach part 1: simple GROW framework

Hey there!??? Today, we are talking about how to “supercharge” yourself with coaching skills, so that you can show up differently at work: either as a leader looking for more useful 1:1s or as an individual contributor with the same objective.

I truly believe that the leaders of the future must have coaching skills and a coaching approach to their teams to even get hired in the first place - one more extra requirement for someone who already wears many hats and is constantly sandwiched between multiple hierarchical layers and stakeholders.

Why are coaching skills important for leaders?

More and more research link the application of the coaching skills of the managers to the performance and well being of their teams: increased productivity, less turn over, increased job satisfaction and engagement, better adaptability when navigating uncertainty.

Employees feel empowered, trusted and supported in their growth.

All this has impact on the ????

When everything seems to be on fire constantly and under high pressure, telling people what to do, asking them to figure things on their own (or else!) or the carrot & stick approach might be the easiest tempting thing to do.

Companies can support managers to adopt a coaching leadership in multiple ways but the most common approach is to (only) offer training. What I often hear is that the momentum lasts for a little while, then slowly the knowledge from the training is forgotten and most people return to their old way of doing things.

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Knowledge without sustained practice for building a new habit rarely sticks. It′s not about knowing more, it′s about practicing more.

A constant post-training follow up, refresh and practical support from the trainer or a coach is needed for a little longer - how many actually receive it?

What can an article magically do for you today?

I am bringing an idea that Google implemented as part of their Project Oxygen after learning that “the most important behaviors of the highest scoring managers was that they were effective coaches”. This discovery was not only limited to managers, but other professions as well.?

The magic starts with accurately understanding the situation and adapting your response: is knowledge that you need to share because the colleague is lacking it? Or should you be a facilitator instead? Open some doors? Just listen? Guide? Mentor? Act quickly because the house is on fire? ??♀?

Pick the right tool from your toolkit.

Step 1: Master the basics of coaching

Coaching skills can be taught and need to be consistently supported by a trainer or a coach during the first months - doing the following is not rocket science but it requires constant practice and external support:

• Listen, truly listen, not just hear ?? : with your ears, your heart, all your senses. Listen for words, emotions, observe the body language, listen for what is not being said.?
• Master your own impulses to offer suggestions before you fully explore what is needed, what they′ve tried, what is going on for them in the current situation.
• Train your patience and get comfortable with holding space for looooong, akward silent moments. #shutUp
• Tweak the way you reply - should it be an advice, an opinion or a question that invites self-reflection? How can you “clean up” your language so that it invites exploration, clarity and focused actions?
• Get curious & dig deeper before shooting from the hip ??: “what else?” and “tell me more” can go a long way.

Step 2: Apply the GROW framework to your 1:1s

Google started with GROW - a very popular and simple model still used in modern coaching because it starts with the end in mind and ends with possible actions to be taken. Quite efficient.

Write it on an index card and experiment with it for your next few 1:1s.

Questions to kickstart you, until you find your own

1. Start with G, the end goal: why are we here?

The standard question is "What is your goal for today′s conversation?" which is good because it puts the other one in the "driver′s seat" and not the manager. I encourage you to get more creative:

• What specifically would you like to work on today, here, with me?

• What would you like to achieve with this conversation today?
• What is the key message to pay attention to, today, with me?
• What would you like to have happened by the time we end our chat today?

...and also slowly work on making the goal SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Results oriented and Time bound) - a 1000% salary increase today might be less A(chievable) in some cases ??

2. Move on to R: what is the current starting point?

The standard question for an easy start could be: “What is the current situation” but then do get curious and dig deeper:

• What worries you about the current situation? (we are emotional beings, allow for emotional expression please....)
• What is happening, specifically? What are the facts?
• What have you tried already? What worked well and what did not work so well?
• What or who seems to be limiting you?
• What do you need?

3. Move on to O: what are some possible options to move forward?

Between the current state and the desired one, there is a gap filled with opportunities.

Divergent thinking is needed at this stage so generate as many options as possible, quantity over quality, without overthinking it. Encourage and allow for crazy thinking too ??

• In an ideal world, what alternatives might there be?
• If “money/time/you name it” was not a problem what would you try?
• What do you have and works in your favor?
• If I were in your shoes, what would you tell me?
• What would “X” do? (X being someone that your colleague admires?or an industry expert)

4. W is the convergent part of the conversation: start narrowing down

• What did you learn that you can apply going forward?
• What? are one or two things that you can experiment with to move the needle?
• Which options motivate you most?
• Who or what can help you? Who & what can hold you back?
• What do you need to make it happen and who else needs to be involved??
• When will you do that??
• What happens if it does not work as you planned initially? How can you adapt the plan ?
• How confident are you in executing this plan?

An article will not change your habits and I know you think you′re? a great manager with a coaching style already.

If you think you still have room to grow I invite you to try something new instead.?It could be GROW, OUTCOMES, CLEAR, etc, or the one I will write next on this topic, around Michael′s Bugay simple framework to coach in your 1:1s. The tools are similar, what matters is to use them for a while to accelerate your own transformation.

If you need some support at the beginning and you cannot find it in your company, I am more than happy to walk with you on this path for as long as you need.?

Share your story

What is working well and not so well in your 1:1s, no matter what "chair" you are sitting in? I am curious to read your stories, if you feel like sharing them with me.

?? Hi! I’m Lu, a life coach for the unapologetically ambitious

?? Interested in how coaching can support you in achieving your goals? Let′s meet for a free chat, no string attached: https://bit.ly/lu-coach

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