Coaching for Emotional Intelligence

“Oh that the gods the gift would gi’e us,” wrote the Scottish poet Robert Burns, “To see ourselves as others see us.”

That’s particularly the case with Emotional Intelligence. We so often have blindspots when it comes to how we manage ourselves and our relationships.

And so we won’t get an accurate EI profile by simply rating ourselves, because any blindspots you might have will skew your perceptions. The best reading – a key impact – of EI is not just in how you manage yourself or interact with others, but in how others perceive you. This is what your EI profile assesses. By combining your own perspective with anonymous feedback from the people you work closely with, a 360o  assessment offers you a more comprehensive and objective understanding of your profile.

Unlike IQ, which can be expressed in a single number, your EI profile reflects your varied strengths and room to grow across a range of competencies

Even if you have an accurate EI profile, as well as a desire for self-improvement, it can be difficult to take steps for lasting change. That takes time and effort. For this reason, it is highly beneficial to have someone invested in your growth to offer guidance and support. A coach can give you valuable real-time feedback, enabling you to course-correct as problems arise.

Everyone benefits from having strengths in Emotional Intelligence. Let’s start with coaches, those folks we turn to when we want to develop ourselves in work and life.

A recent study published in the Journal of Experiential Psychotherapy found that of 1,138 coaches and their clients from 88 countries, 98% of coaches agreed that having strong Emotional Intelligence themselves was essential to effectively assist their clients. And 90% of coaching clients agreed that it is important for clients to develop EI to work through their challenges.

Why? Take trust. The best coaches establish a foundation of trust with their coachees. Then there’s rapport and engagement – coaches know these are essential to cultivate quality conversations that promote effort and growth. These conversations should be authentic and individualized, which requires empathy, another Emotional Intelligence competence.

Cookie-cutter, one-size-fits-all, coaching – say that encourages the memorization of complex acronyms, or learning through predetermined, jargon-filled language, is much less likely to resonate with people. These indicate coaches who lack empathy – and likely also lack the self-awareness that would alert them to this deficit in the coaching relationship.

Emotional Intelligence provides a simple, yet highly-personalized profile of your strengths and limits, which in turn creates a framework for coaching for developing lasting behavioral change.   

If you are interested in coaching others for EI, I encourage you to apply for my Emotional Intelligence Coaching Certification.

And if coaching isn’t for you, but you still want to upgrade your Emotional Intelligence, this fall I will be launching an online program for learning the fundamentals of EI. And if you want to be coached for EI, that, too, will be an option. Stay tuned.