Coaching Commentary #9 Article 1 on Self-Esteem
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[Coach Tom] At the heart of self, where the essence of our being lies, there is a place of identity where one finds themself. Self-Esteem provides the energy and motivation to take on challenges and derive satisfaction from work. The sense of accomplishment that follow sets itself up in a virtuous cycle. Marvelous that coaching can help one unlock hidden powers to activate and increase self-esteem and move towards a better version of self. It’s such a lovely gift.?
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Building Self Esteem
Self esteem is your own personal view of yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally.?Everyone has a different view of themselves, but keeping a positive outlook will benefit you more than a negative one.?Many individuals suffer from low self esteem for a variety of reasons and need to build their self esteem in order to succeed in life.?Remember, the only one who can make you excel is you and no one else.?The same goes for self esteem.?The only person who can build up—or consequentially tear down—your self esteem is you.?Although other individuals may aide the process, the end decision is yours.
People have low esteem for a variety of reasons.?Some individuals suffer from poor body image and focus on all the negative traits of their physical appearance.?Others have emotional issues that have caused their self esteem to drop or feel themselves unworthy of any praise.?For whatever reasons your self esteem may falter, the key to building it up again is to find the root of the problem.?Think of self esteem like a house, if you build a stunning house on a poor foundation, the entire structure will crumble.?However, if you take steps to ensure the foundation is strong and capable of holding anything, the process may be slow, but your self esteem will be built soundly.?
Many individuals look for help for their low self esteem in books or seminars.?The number of available options on the market is phenomenal, and you are sure to find one on a topic that deals with your specific issues.?Check out your local library or book store and explore their “self help” section for a book that you may find helpful.?It is quite unlikely you will find the answers to all your problems in a book, but you may find it helpful to know others are in your same boat and you are certainly not alone.?Additionally, you may wish to seek professional help in your quest to boost your self esteem.??Often, speaking with a qualified individual can help you determine the root of your problem and the necessary path you should take for the rebuilding process.?Perhaps your problems dates back to childhood, or maybe it has recently developed.?Whatever the case, a professional will be able to best determine your next step.
A main factor in self esteem is negativity.?Negative thoughts can pervade your confidence and crumble your self esteem.?If you find yourself surrounded by negative people or in a negative situation, try to best remedy the problem.?Often, individuals in a abusive relationship have their self esteem shattered when a supposed loved one constantly berates them and questions their worth.?Similarly, a negative workplace environment can lower your self esteem with colleagues or bosses finding fault with your work.?Maybe you have a friend who is consistently negative with all surrounding him or her.?Whatever the source, distancing yourself from the negativity will help you regain your self esteem.?Strive to surround yourself with positive people.?If you are going through a rough time in your personal life, you may wish to join a support group. ?Similarly, there are support groups available for individuals with self image issues.?These groups will allow you to meet other individuals like yourself and provide a forum for you to sound your hopes and achievements.
However you choose to begin building your self esteem, do so today!?Be thorough and consistent with the process and be aware it may take a while.?You should not become impatient or despondent if you find your self esteem slipping.?Remember, you are an important and worthy person and should treat yourself as such.
Understanding Low Self Esteem
Low self esteem can be devastating to an individual’s personal, work, and scholastic life.?The constant feeling of inadequacy and unworthiness can undermine attempts to succeed at even the smallest things.?If you find yourself plagued with such feelings, you may need to ask “Do I have low self esteem?”?Self esteem is your own view of yourself, your capabilities, and your attributes.?It is impossible to succeed in life if you are constantly second guessing and berating yourself over the tiniest detail.?Many individuals suffer from low self esteem, so you are certainly not alone.?Some individuals have recently begun to question their self esteem while others have been doing so their entire lives.?Whatever your situation, honestly answering these questions will give you a great deal of insight into how you view yourself.
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Are you nervous or awkward around other individuals??These people can be coworkers, friends, family members, or even strangers on the street.?Do you ever look at anyone and think you are not on the same “level” as they are physically, mentally, or athletically??Do you see yourself as the least important member of your family, group of friends, or office??These persistent feelings can erode your self esteem.?Most likely, you are the only one who thinks these things.?Ask your friends, coworkers, and family members about your performance, attitude, and personality.?More than likely, you will be pleasantly surprised.?Remember to rank your own needs up there with the needs of others.?Quite often, individuals with low self esteem strive to please everyone but themselves in order to make themselves feel more adequate.?This act usually backfires since your focus is on those surrounding you instead of yourself.?Dig deep and figure out your own needs.?Focusing on yourself for a while will allow you to identify to root cause of your self esteem issues so that you can go about conquering them.
Do you worry or obsess about your physical appearance??Are you constantly trying to change your appearance for what you think is the better??These feelings of inadequacy are quite common, especially among children and women.?Often, individuals notice certain qualities about themselves as children due to comments by a friend, family member, or school mate.?These feelings harbor themselves inside, making them stronger and deeper-rooted.?Some individuals obsess about their weight, height, statue, bone structure, facial features, hair, and any thing else under the sun.?These issues can become the root of serious problems, including eating disorders.?Even the most beautiful people in the world have some feelings of inadequacy about their outward appearance.?The people society deems beautiful or perfect have secret issues about their own appearance or body, so you are definitely not alone.?Instead of constantly worrying about those aspects you deem as negative, focus on the positive.?If you find yourself slipping into a dangerous or deadly habit, seek professional help as soon as possible.?The world has learned to live with you, now you must make the decision to live with yourself.?Once you are comfortable in your own skin, your self confidence will soar sky-high.
Do you publicly berate yourself for fun??Is your idea of a good conversation tearing yourself down at the expense of others??Would you rather talk about your failures and weaknesses over your successes and strengths??This is often the case with individuals with low self esteem.?Instead of accentuating the positive, they verbalize that constantly criticizing voice they hear in their own heads.?Whatever the case, if you find yourself to be suffering from low self esteem, there are ways to rebuild from within.?Seek help from friends, family members, colleagues, self-help books, or professionals if necessary.?Low self esteem is a problem that should not be ignored.
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