The Coach in My Corner

Do you ever look at someone and think to yourself, “Wow, that person has the world by the tail. They’re so confident and squared away. They must have the respect of everyone around them.” Or, perhaps you’re thinking the person seems to hold command over a room full of people with undeniable self-confidence. You might be surprised to hear the actual thoughts that person may have running through their head or the perspective from which they view themselves.

An unfortunate driver of highly motived (and highly successful) people can sometimes be self-doubt. They have a drive to be more. To do more. To do better. To be better. They feel they are never enough. Never work hard enough. Aren’t good enough. Is this surprising? Maybe or maybe not.

We all have things to work on when it comes to our professional and personal life. If we didn’t, we wouldn’t be growing. Knowing the work we need to do and then finding healthy ways to do it can be both productive and satisfying. For some, the need is finding the confidence to lead a meeting successfully. Giving a presentation to a room full of colleagues can be debilitating for many people. Even having the courage to share a new idea with a supervisor is something that can be far from comfortable.

For me, walking into a room full of people (even those I know) causes me a tremendous amount of anxiety. I have to muster up the courage as much on the 200th time as I had to on the first. However, I’ve learned coping techniques and ways to overcome the fear of rejection. As many of us have done throughout our lives, we have turned to those we consider mentors or coaches to help us overcome our challenges.

I highly recommend seeking mentors and engaging in coaching. Someone whom we trust, who has expertise in the area we are hoping to improve upon. Someone who is way more knowledgeable than we are.

So, here is the leap I’m making in my relationship with God, the ultimate coach. If you’ve known me as an adult, you would probably assume I had a high degree of self- confidence. But inside, I have always been my harshest critic. For most of my adult life, I’ve been filled with self-doubt and fear. Always questioning my worth and never believing that I’m “good enough.” It’s a battle I have waged with myself for so long, it’s exhausting.

I’ve worked through it in therapy and with professional coaches and mentors. But nothing convinced me of my worth or provided the confidence I ultimately needed until my God woke me to His grace and unconditional love. It was like a lightning bolt and thunderclap at once. I reflected on the fact that I am chosen. I am His. He gave His life for me so that I could overcome the kingdom of this world and forever live in His kingdom. That, despite all my sins and shortcomings, I am enough for Him and therefore, I’m enough for me! How amazing is that?!

If he can overlook some of my shortcomings and still love me as He does, I must give myself the same grace that He gives me. I’m not saying my insecurities have vanished. Far from it. But when they creep into my life, I remind myself that He is my greatest supporter and coach, and that if He believes in me, I owe it to myself to believe in me, too.

We all struggle and tend to seem better on the outside than we are on the inside. Know you’re not alone. Be kind to yourself. Give yourself a bit of a break. Know that He is your biggest fan and believes in you more than you can ever know.

Romans 8:31 – If God is for us, who can be against us?