Closed Doors Aren't Always a Dead End

The door to the master bedroom in my house doesn’t latch.

I don’t know anything about door frames, or hanging doors or why they do or don’t latch, and I probably should have had this fixed by now, but I haven’t and it’s ok.? It’s just me and the dogs at home and frankly, the door latching is not a huge concern for me.?

But sometimes I close my door. Is that weird? Why close a door when there’s no one else in the house and the door itself doesn't even latch properly? I’m honestly not sure. I guess a closed door represents: privacy; security; possibly even protection. But let’s be honest - my door is a facade at best. Just a perceived barrier between my bedroom and the rest of the house. Because it doesn’t latch.? And I’m ok with that.?

Here’s why I tell you about my door and the fact that it’s closed right now while I write this.? When I close my bedroom door to, say, fold laundry or take a bath or write for a while, sometimes I close the door so my dogs won’t come in.?

See, my dogs, smart and cute and amazing as they might be, view my closed door as a dead end. A barrier separating them from their human. Jack, in particular, will sit outside my closed door, as long as I keep it closed, and be SO SAD until I let him in. Every now and then, you’ll hear this pathetic scratch - barely a scratch even - almost a forlorn paw against the door as if to say, “How could you shut me out?” It’s the saddest, most pitiable attempt to get through this blockade.? When the scratches don’t work, he will start to cry. A bleak, sad, plaintive whine. “Mommmm…open the door.”

It’s just SO SAD.??

Now listen, Jack is a 3 year old rescue mutt. His favorite words are ‘treat’ and ‘hungry’ and ‘car ride’. He doesn’t know much about doors. But with this door in question - the non-latching, facade of a master bedroom door - it’s a blockade and impediment to his WHOLE WORLD (me). What Jack doesn’t know is if he just put a tiny bit of effort into that pathetic little paw-to-door action he’s out there doing, or lean just a bit into his little cries to let him in, the door would give way. The door would no longer be a barrier but rather a gateway to his person.?

Jack’s behavior at my closed bedroom door has lately gotten me thinking - man! Isn’t that just a metaphor for life and how a lot of us, myself included, approach those perceived barriers in our lives.?

Barriers exist in our lives for a number of reasons - there are those that are self-imposed and there are those that are imposed upon us. The truth is though, that the majority of barriers are personal and based on pre-established notions and concepts.

I’m not good enough.?

I’m too young.

I’m not lovable.?

I’ve got too much baggage.

I don’t have enough education.

I failed at this once before; I’ll surely fail again.?

Most of these barriers are perceived or ingrained. The majority of the perceived blockages from you and what lies on the other side of that door, are limited only by your own effort or your life experiences that have conditioned you to believe you are stuck.?

The best you can do is sit at the door and cry. Or feebly attempt to enter. Or turn around and go find your toy and your bed and just give up on the closed door (like my other dog, Nacho, typically does.)?

But here’s the thing. That door / blockage / barrier /? insecurity / past failure - it might very well be a facade. Or it might just require a little bit of your effort to open.?

How many times have you heard some variation of the phrase, “when one door closes, another opens”, or “if God closes a door, He will open a window!”? The core meaning of these is that, if one thing you do fails, you will soon have an opportunity to try to succeed at something else. This expression is often used to encourage someone to keep trying after they have had a disappointment or failure.

But why is a door a failure? Or a disappointment? What if a door is a test? Or a temporary roadblock to see if we will persevere? Have you actually tested that closed door? Pushed against it at all? Maybe the door is only a stoppage to allow you to catch your breath; reassess; consider your next move.?

Maybe, just maybe, everything you want is still on the other side of that door but it requires just a bit of effort on your part to get there. If you didn’t try every door that closed in your face, how many potential opportunities might you be walking away from? And how much time will you waste crying in the hallway, willing the door to open, when all you have to do is just push on it - apply a bit of effort and a willingness to not give up??

Next time life presents you with a closed door I challenge you to test it. Is what you really want beyond that barrier? If so, then consider that, while the door might be closed, it may not be latched.? And you are the only thing keeping you from walking through it.