Choose Your Thoughts

It's a crisis!

Dory has been taken away from Martin and Nemo.

And it looks like they may be parted forever....

That is the setting for this scene in the film, "Finding Dory."

Martin says:?

"What would Dory do??

She would assess her situation.?

And she’d evaluate.

And she would analyze her options."

Nemo responds:?

"Yeah, that’s what would Marlin do."

Martin says:

"Yeah, that’s what I would do."

She wouldn’t even think twice.?

She would look at the first thing she sees -"?

Martin looks around as he says that line and then there it is an idea!

Do you see how changing his thinking, changed Martin's reality?

Our Thinking Limits Us

Humans think.?

That’s what differentiates us from other species, right??

We have the power to think, analyze, assess and make choices.?

And, we think this is the source of our free will.?

Yet, it’s the same thinking that gives you choices that can also limit them.?

Here is an example:?

You make a mistake and you say to yourself,

“Ugh. I shouldn’t have done that! I should have (fill in the blank) Instead! Aargh!”?

That’s a thinking pattern.

It’s a sequence of thoughts that will come up for you in certain circumstances.

Something goes wrong, you start judging yourself.?

Know the feeling?

Or, how about this:

You’re driving and another driver on the road is annoying you.?

You honk.?

You curse.?

You call the driver “an idiot!”

Then, you continue a loop in your mind about what happened.

Those negative thoughts and your related state affect how you perceive your reality.?

They influence:

• your mood,
• your energy,
• what you say, how you say it
• and how you show up which influences -
• how you perceive whatever else is around you.?

Choose a New Thinking Pattern

So, what happens when Martin becomes aware of his own thinking pattern and chooses to think like Dory instead?

He sees entirely new possibilities!?

Within seconds of looking around the way Dory would, he sees a new escape route!?

By adapting a different pattern of thought, Martin can do things he’s never done before!

The same can be true for you.

Adapt a different pattern of thought and you can do entirely new things!!

It can be a helpful tool to think of someone who you admire handling a particular issue.?

It gives your brain a whole new way of imagining possibilities.?

So who’s pattern of thought do you want to adapt?

Who can you pretend to be to help you get through a difficult situation?

Recognize YOUR Strengths

When Dory learns that Martin asked himself, “What would Dory do?” to find her, she is surprised!

She had never recognized the strength of her own thinking pattern.?

Like the rest of us, she had dwelled on her weakness. Her forgetting.

She gains a new awareness of her own thinking pattern as a strength.?

With that awareness, she can be more intentional about it the next time she is in a crisis.?

What is the thinking pattern that is your strength?

How can you use it to empower you in new situations?

Difficult Conversations: "What Would Dory Do?"

The next time that you are in a difficult conversation, do what Dory would do.?

Investigate.?

LISTEN

1) Listen to the things you typically say. They represent thought patterns.?

• Investigate your own thought patterns.
• As you become more aware of your own thoughts, you find more choices.?
• That’s how you expand your free will.

2) Listen more into that moment.?

• Become more aware of your surroundings.
• Expand your perceptions.
• This will widen your capacity for new thinking.?

3) Listen more to the other person.

• Listen to understand them. (That doesn’t mean you have to agree.)
• Listen to how they think and how they understand reality.?

By listening differently, you will hear and notice different things.?

By hearing and noticing different things, you will sense new possibilities.?

Your Turn: How can asking yourself "What Would Dory Do?" help YOU meet your next big challenge?