Choose Your Hard
Michael Knouse
Coach | Advisor | Facilitator | Writer | Instructor helping managers unlock their potential and unleash their team's performance | Building a boundless business and sharing everything I learn along the way.
There is a universal truth that is convenient to ignore.?
No matter which path you choose, there will be challenges, speedbumps, and difficulties that arise.?
For example, eating fast food saves time and some of it even tastes good. But it’s unhealthy and will leave you feeling sluggish and tired. Not to mention what it will do to your waistline and overall health over the long-term.
This decision to choose the quick and tasty option seems easy …until it becomes hard.
Planning and preparing healthy meals is hard. It takes time and effort. But you’ll feel energized and vibrant day-to-day. And over time, your health will improve and you’ll naturally resist heart disease, cancer, and diabetes.
This decision feels hard at first …but easy as you go along.
Either decision is hard, but different.??
Everything Worth Doing Is Hard
Everything worth doing will probably feel hard.
I'm not talking about the grind-for-the-sake-of-grinding mentality that's become a badge of honor in many circles of entrepreneurship.
I'm talking about choosing your ‘hard’ - the idea that every path is difficult, so be deliberate about choosing one that will fulfill you.
I often think about why most people shy away from ‘hard’ stuff. I think it's because we've been conditioned to believe that success should be easy - like we see people promoting on Instagram and TikTok.
But there are two kickers:
After college, I climbed the corporate ladder for 11 years and was rewarded with more responsibility, more money, more stock options, and a better network. And it was damn hard.
The long hours, the family sacrifices, and the constant battle to stay ahead in a race that seemed never-ending.?
And to top it all off, it was an unfulfilling kind of hard. I finished work every day completely drained, instead of energized.
Then I pivoted.
I intentionally chose the path of building my own business. And guess what? It's incredibly hard too.
There’s the uncertainty, the weight of every decision on your shoulders, and the fear that it might all go away. But this hard feels different. It's exciting and it's 100% mine. Every outcome, good or bad, is a direct result of my actions and choices.
So, what's your hard going to be?
If it’s working a career and going down the more proven path, that’s awesome. But expect that it’ll be hard and remember to be conscious of your level of fulfillment.
If you’re not fulfilled? Start something on the side. There's never been a better, easier or more important time to do so. When you do, you get to choose the hard that ignites you and jolts you out of bed with excitement every morning.?
Here are a couple of interesting predictions:
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You have the ability to learn anything on the internet, build whatever you want, and accept payment from almost anyone, anywhere, anytime.
A New Model for Doing Hard Things
When you contemplate the idea of choosing your hard, what comes to mind??
The existing model that has become ubiquitous in today’s world is this notion of pushing through adversities of extremes - forcing ourselves to endure pain and hardships. As a result, we achieve thick skin; calluses that form into resiliency to endure life’s other hardships. It’s this idea of bravado and masochism persevering; someone that exudes bombastic energy with bold self-confidence.?
In Steve Magness’ book, Do Hard Things, he concludes that this old, time-worn model of toughness hasn’t worked; that our model for existing toughness or what Steve describes as, “bulldozing through” oftentimes, “leads to a worse outcome.”?
Do Hard Things tasks us with re-thinking the ingrained ideas we have about the traditional model of toughness, while at the same time, providing us with the mental tools to develop real toughness.?
What I mean by real toughness is the confidence that will equip us to not only do hard things that challenge us and help us grow, but to enjoy the process of engaging in difficult projects, athletic challenges, or conversations, all of which will help us become better, happier people.
Magness argues that toughness is about:
“ …making the pull for closure amid uncertainty work for you, not against you. It’s training the mind to handle uncertainty long enough so that you can nudge or guide your response in the right direction. To create space so that you don’t jump straight from unease to the quickest possible solution, but to the [correct] one.”
To Summarize
The real question is, what are you willing to endure for the sake of something that truly fulfills you?
I choose my hard every day and it makes a profound difference in the quality of my life.?
I choose to be my own boss and do work that uplifts and fulfills me.?
I choose to go to the gym 5-6 days a week to stay healthy and strong.
I choose to eat healthy most of the time, even when it feels inconvenient.?
If you feel unfulfilled, are you willing to try something hard that has more personal upside?
Give it some thought. There’s no right answer.
But thinking about it might just redefine your entire approach to work and life.
That’s all for this week.
Live bravely,
Michael
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