Choose the Life You Want to Live... And Challenge Yourself to Live It

Do you feel angry, apathetic, sad, disconnected, or any other self defeating emotion? I’m not a medical professional, but I believe all of these emotions are normal, present, and “available” for us at any given time. Many of these emotions are brought on by triggers and outside forces. The problem today is, there are so many “ triggers,” we sometimes forget to process the emotion, or deal with it by acknowledging it and letting it go. Instead, we embrace it along with the victimology it allows us to wallow in. This can lead to soul exhaustion, mental and physical breakdown, depression, and isolation.

Jana and I have studied much of this and, more importantly, the path to positivity for many years. Two of our favorite quotes on the subject are:

1. Dr. Wayne Dyer “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”
2. Marcus Aurelius “If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.”

Dr. Wayne Dyer went on to talk about an Albert Einstein observation that our most fundamental observation that we, as humans, have to make in life is “Do we live in friendly or hostile universe?” Once we decide what world we live in, that’s what we will see in the world. How many times have you gone to a party or a meeting or anywhere you didn’t want to go because you had preconceived notions or “played out” how the event would happen in your mind already. And you just knew it would go badly…and then it did just that! Did you get anyone else’s opinion on the event? I can tell you from experience that Marcus Aurelius and Dr. Wayne Dyer have proven their theories over and over in my my life. Whenever we had a gathering that would include a certain employee, a condescending boss, a certain in-law (name your example here), one of us would start saying things like 

“I don’t even want to go because I already know exactly what’s going to happen. So and so is going to say ______ and I’m going to respond with something we will both regret.” We would go out of obligation and commitment, or love, and spend most of the time searching for the evidence to prove that our preconceived notion was correct. That’s what the brain does. The brain wants to be right and it will search out evidence to prove to itself right so you win, but you lose here.

What if you were convinced that you were the master of your mood and arbiter of your emotions? What if you knew no matter what, you are going to be your best self, have a great time, and be joyful; because you know that’s who you are at your core and that’s who you prefer to hang out with and present to the world?

When Marcus Aurelius said, “If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment,” he was saying that we have the power to choose how we react to situations, words, or circumstances. What a concept. Many powerful and successful thought leaders have adopted this and understand it’s truth. Most of us have heard that life is not about what happens to you, but about how you respond to it. 

You may have heard Charles Swindoll’s quote, “I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it.” We have the mental ability to not respond or engage in the negative and continue to move forward, but do we have the discipline to put our egos aside and succeed without the drama?

Life is less tiresome when it’s fun. Engagement is energizing. Let’s be the magnetic personalities that we can’t wait to see every morning. Over the next few weeks, I will post a 6 blog series (articles) with challenges designed to change your life…they changed mine.

In the coming week, I hope you will think about where you are in life. Are you exactly where you want to be? Do you have what you want to have? Are you the person you want to be?

If the answer is no to any of those questions, Jana and I also have accountability Zoom calls focussed around specific areas to help. 

Preview to the Challenge Series

1. Gratitude
2. Thankfulness
3. Kindness
4. Removing the BH
5. Health
6. Taste Bud Training
7. Social Media & News Fast
8. Clean Mouth

“Life has two faces - the beautiful and the ugly. Life is a responder and not an initiator or a dictator. It responds not to your circumstances but to your attitude to them. It waits in the wings until you dictate your attitude to a situation. Life then responds with a corresponding face that matches your attitude - ugly for ugly, beautiful for beautiful. In essence, you choose your own life. It would seem that God has given you an enormous power to be the initiator or the dictator of the life you wish to live.” 

― Abiodun Fijabi

Be good to yourself so you can be better for others.

Jason Shelfer