CHOOSE TO CHALLENGE : A STORY

All over the world, International Women’s Day will be celebrated on 8th March and I will surely do my bit to make the best of this campaign. As I pen my thoughts on International Women's Day, I cannot help but feel a sense of relief on the completion of year 2020. A year which threw many challenges upon us and the world at large. Good part is, that we choose to accept these hurdles and take them head on. The way all genders balanced household, professional commitments and supported each other is truly commendable.  That said, we must not rest on accomplishments but keep questioning the status quo, our own thinking, biases and judgements.

The theme #Ichoosetochallenge brought back memories of my life journey thus far – a chapter of which I am sharing with readers of this column.

My upbringing was in a conservative Bengali family, led by my grandfather, an individual honored by Govt of India for contributions to India’s freedom movement. He was also a highly respected, first generation Bengali businessman. From just few annas in his pocket, he toiled very hard to setup East India’s possibly first plywood factory(1930s), develop commercial and residential buildings, import Bengal’s first press machines for the ply factory, providing employment to several who were trying to find their feet post-Independence. During the freedom movement , some of his close brothers and uncles lost their lives. In his limited capacity, he ensured that the widowed wives (I used to call them bua or grannies) of these brave hearts, were provided with a home and enough provisions to enable them to live a life of dignity. As a child, I used to visit the grannies , hear stories from them and enjoy their love and attention. The strength of grandpa, to toil tirelessly and touch so many lives, surely came from his wife, my grandmother – a rock solid personality with a heart of pure gold! Of the many lessons I learnt from them, the most endearing one was on “financial independence of women”. They made me open my first savings account when I was still in secondary school, way back in late 1980s. I asked them, “why is that necessary when I am not even earning and don’t even intend to. I am sure you will leave enough and I will also be married. My husband will provide for me.” I recall, my grandfather got very upset by this and he said, ‘remember you have to provide for yourself, if you get more count those as blessings’. By God’s grace, he lived a long and healthy life till the age of 92 years. Needless to mention, if my grandparents are finding so much space in this column, it can be assumed, much of my formative years, has been under their immense influence.

In early 2000s, when my grandparents passed away, I found my anchor and mentorship under the wings of some very accomplished ladies in corporate world. With time, as I grew the ranks, from a fresher to middle management and finally to senior management, I got the opportunity to observe and work closely with highly regarded leaders in several prestigious organizations. 

The past 21 years of corporate journey, has led me to meet diverse individuals, who either by their good or bad behaviors, shaped my thinking, Every hurtful experience has made me emerge stronger.

Life will throw many googlies at the workplace and outside. There would be days when you may feel like just hanging up your boots, leave the “rat race” – so to say, and there would other days, when you would be motivated and raring to face all adversities head-on. There would be days, when you may struggle to balance societal and professional commitments and there would also be days, when you will feel in total control of your circumstances.

There have been times when I have taken up the challenge or sometimes let go.

Sharing a few #choosetochallenge moments from my personal story, addressed especially to women who might be reading this:

?       Choose your anchor and mentor within family or relatives or outside, you will need inspirations. Watch and learn from them in close quarters;

?       Choose your battles, not all would be worth fighting for;

?       Choose how you wish to grow in your career, at a comfortable pace or fast pace, there is nothing right or wrong, but each one would have its consequence. Try to be at peace with that!

?       Choose to ask yourself, each time, you are presented with a job change, why is this change necessary, does the change help in your career purpose ?

?       Choose to make a career, there a difference between doing a job and preparing for a career.

?       Choose to reach out and grow your network beyond your comfortable space, you will always find interesting people who will fuel your aspirations;

?       Choose your life partner very wisely, I keep saying this to all prospective brides to be. Its essential for your own wellbeing and peace of mind. There are many remarkable men out there, who respect women and will give ample space for the partner to spread their wings.

?       Do know, there will be certain stages of a woman’s life, especially when the family grows that priorities may change. It easy to stress about the fact that your peer has got that promotion, you so worked hard for. Remember your time will always come.

?       Choose your financial goals and make progressive action towards the same – you may find a sense of achievement.

?       Choose to challenge the gender stereotyping of jobs. The more you break such myths, the more you will make path for many women who will tread the roads less travelled.

Finally - Be prepared with the knowledge, that you may encounter bad and some aggressive behaviours at workplaces. People from varying backgrounds and upbringing come to work and they bring with them their own personalities. It may intimidate you, but do speak up! There will also be people who will listen and support you.

Women at workplace are a community by themselves! Let’s learn and keep encouraging each other for a better tomorrow.

Happy Women’s Day ! and

I will continue to challenge myself !

Written by Aditi Mukherjee, HR Leader and part top management in a leading, professionally managed stock exchange.

Disclaimer: “This column is personal view and does not reflect necessarily reflect the official position the author holds or policies of the organization”