In A Chokehold, Issue #39

In A Chokehold, Issue #39

I could tell that he was under a lot of pressure.

Like he was gasping for air.

I was on a consultation call with a gentleman late last year and he expressed to me how he was starting to feel the weight of his responsibilities, trying to keep it all together.

Somehow the harder he tried, the tighter the grip felt.

In today’s newsletter, we’re going to talk about breaking free from this chokehold.



I’m no stranger to feeling the squeeze as a solo professional, but as I continued to listen to this gentleman, I realized that some of the built-up pressure was self-inflicted.

The problem?

He struggled with delegating and thought that if he did, that it meant that he couldn’t handle it. He was very anal about tasks and that made it even more difficult for him to let go.

He was trying to control every detail, which I think is the first mistake, especially if you notice that your business is starting to grow.

He was certainly suffering from what I call the…

DIY Chokehold.

That was the diagnosis that I felt was most fitting (I know because I recognize some of these tendencies in myself. I’m also a work in progress.)

This happens when you refuse or struggle to delegate because you think that no one else can complete your tasks the way you can, even the ones that don’t really need your full attention. (Need I say perfectionist?)

I’m sure some of you can relate to this.

I’ve come to realize that sometimes the chokehold isn’t about the workload itself, but how much we want to be in control. (There really are a lot of control freaks running around.)

When we learn to let go of that control that’s when we start to feel that grip loosen, and we can finally breathe again. Those who become aware of this can let go without feeling guilt.


The Bottom Line:

One thing I know is that the pressure will always be there, but we don’t have to let it hold us back. When we come to the realization that we don’t have to do it all, that’s when we’ll finally break free from our self-inflicted chokehold.


A Better Plan for Solo Professionals

That’s why I’ve created a 2025 Content Calendar tailored specifically for solo professionals like you. Those who don’t have the hours to spend figuring out what to post, but still want to show up online in a meaningful way.

What’s Inside?

  • 3 weekly post ideas to keep your content consistent and engaging.
  • A mix of educational, promotional, and fun prompts to help you connect with your audience.
  • Monthly themes to keep you organized and aligned with your goals.

With this calendar, you’ll stop rolling the dice and guessing what works. Stop leaving your success up to chance. When we know better, we do better.



Shamayne Brown is a virtual assistant and the founder of Camp Virtual Assistance. She works with solo professionals and small business owners who are ready to invest in their business and need the support that she offers as they continue to grow and scale.

She specializes in helping them with all the admin work in their businesses like blog updates, email newsletters and calendar management. View a complete list of her services here.


Stephany Poe

Merger of Generations in the Workplace | Owner & Founder of POEE Coaching and Consulting LLC | Author | DE&I Certified | Wellness Coach | Women's Advocate | People's Advocate | Healthy Work Culture | Self-Care Advocate

1 个月

This is very insightful! I find myself in a choke hold at times, but I've learned how to let go allow things to flow as they may and things have been much easier. Even when reading newsletters like this it helps! Thank you!

Nancy Mueller

Whatever's Causing Unhappiness For You, Let's End It Together

1 个月

When we hold on too tightly to what we have, we limit ourselves to what "could be"

Tamare A. Fleury

USA Army Combat Veteran | Retirement Benefits Consultant | Insurance Broker.

1 个月

Letting go can feel terrifying, but sometimes, loosening our grip is exactly what we need to breathe, grow, and move forward. Control can be an illusion, true strength lies in trust and flow.

Abdiel Sanchez

Virtual Assistant |Administrative Assistant |Remote Work

1 个月

I'm the kind of person who likes to have control over everything. But after reading this article, I realized that this isn't really good for my professional growth and can actually mess with other parts of my life, too.

FRAN FOMAI

The Finder of Voices that have been SILENT for too long. I help high performers process emotions & gain clarity through deep listening (Decompression Sessions)

1 个月

First word I thought of was micromanagement. I experienced something today about assigning feelings to a situation, conversation or event can create anxiety and I don't want that. Saying what I needed to say without the emotions provides clarity when delivering. Then I can assign and process the emotion that I want to assign.

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