The Choices We Make: Mark Talley & Agents For Advocacy

For the past several weeks, I have spent the bulk majority of my 'off time' preparing for my interview with Jacquie Abram, Future Cain and John Graham Jr. I have been rereading John's Book, 'Plantation Theory' and finishing Jacquie's 'Hush Money' Series. The entire time looking for the intersection of their lived experience that would make for the best series of topics on August 4th.

I did not realize that as I put out promotion after promotion of the event and sharing my lived experience on social media, that I was also gaining Jacquie's unwavering respect and trust.

The moment I did realize it was Friday afternoon 1:52pm pacific. I was finishing up my work for the week and I get a message from Jacquie.

"Hi Dan,

I have a friend whose mother was killed in the Buffalo Racist Shooting Massacre. Would you like to interview him at some point? I can introduce you."

-Jacquie

I am not going to lie, when I got this message I was frozen in my tracks. I did not know what to think, what to do, I was shocked that she trusted me with such a delicate topic.

I responded,

"Hey Jacquie. Thanks for thinking of me. I need to think on that and whether or not I would be the right person. It’s extremely heavy and a lot of responsibility and I would want to make sure I could do it justice."

Being an abolitionist and anti-racist is one thing. But interviewing the son of Geraldine Talley, a woman who lost her life in one of the worst massacre's in American History, a massacre carried out by a racist is another.

My initial instinct was to say NO. My gut told me as someone that shares the same skin color as the shooter, it is not my place to be the one to interview her son.

Mulling It Over

Once the shock subsided a bit, I reached out to two of my close friends, Jen Buck and Desiree B Stephens. As trusted confidants, I wanted to know what they thought.

Jen first agreed with my initial thoughts but then pointed out something I had not thought about.

It was Jacquie Abram, who asked me to do it. A Black woman and author who has been oppressed and came out the other side. Her coming to me, her trusting me, her having belief that I could use my platform to spread Mark Talley's message to an audience he might not otherwise have access to...well...that means something.

Making a Choice

The following two nights I went to bed not sure of what to do. Then a strange thing happened. I woke up Sunday morning clear headed and with a plan.

Jen was right, Jacquie trusted me and she did so for a reason.

I decided to do it.

But if I was going to, I needed to make sure I was doing it right.

Before giving an answer I asked Jacquie for her interview with Mark.

I needed to understand better what I was getting myself into.

Then I reached out to Kesha Kent. For those that do not know her, Kesha is a globally recognized diversity expert.

I told Kesha, if I was going to do this it could not be me alone. As a white male I can not fully empathize with Mark's lived experience. I needed her to join me. She can provide context and follow up during the interview I would have no way of doing.

The other thing I told Kesha, was that this would not be your standard interview. Taking this on my job is to provide Mark the platform to tell his story, to have a place to speak his truth free of bias or judgement.

Finally, we would use our resources to bring awareness to Mark's non-profit, Agents for Advocacy.

The moment Kesha agreed was the moment I told Jacquie of the plan.

She loved it and assured me Mark would too.

Speaking to Mark

Jacquie immediately put me into a conversation with Mark and once again I laid out my plan. Mark was happy with the direction we were going in and let me know that his central goal was to honor his mother by speaking out, speaking up and educating. He shared the passion he has for his non profit and how he wished he would have created it sooner.

We ended our conversation promising to follow up and get a date picked out so we can share his message with the world.

***

Acknowledging Those that May Not Be Happy With Me

As mentioned above, my decision to say yes to doing this interview was not one I took lightly.

I am aware that there are going to be Black Folk that look at me and do not believe I have any business interviewing a Black Man who lost his mother in a shooting carried out by a white individual.

There will also be white people that feel like I have no place in this spot. There is a high likelihood that there will be trolls that come out of the woodwork to push hate speech during the live.

I have had people I consider friends concerned if this is the right move for me.

To all of you that fit in the above categories, here is my response...

This is NOT about me. Whatever hate I may get, whatever comments people choose to make, that does not matter.

The only thing that matters is that Mark has a platform and opportunity to share his story so that not a single person forgets what happened.

If I can provide that to him, then as a father, as a son as a friend it is my responsibility to do it.

Which is why that is exactly what we are going to do.