Chasing Risk

I wouldn't class myself as a thrill-seeker as such. I don't seek out adrenaline inducing activities such as sky diving or bull riding, god no, quite the opposite - I spend my free time drinking wine and relaxing. However, when it comes to my career I have an innate desire to challenge myself and put myself under pressure. And when I don't feel like I'm on the back foot or under some serious amount of pressure, I crave it. 

So this uneasiness, edginess - let's call it, grows inside me until it gets satisfied with a flood of incompetence and a steep hill to climb to reach the top. As you can imagine, doing this a number of times throughout your career can be quite exhausting. But, through practising measured and strategic career change, I genuinely believe you can fast-track your learning; passing through many different work-life environments. 

With the average person in the UK spending 42.5 hours per week at work, amounting 170 hours per month, that’s almost the same amount of time as sleep. And once we add in commuting, eating, unwinding, socialising etc; there’s say 5% of time left over. And, if you're anything like me, you’ll spend a lot of time outside of work thinking about it, obsessing over how to be better and reflecting on the learning so far.

I believe the things we see and do at work contribute significantly to who we are. At work, we build extremely close and trusting relationships, as well as relationships that are not so favourable; both equally teach us valuable lessons. We learn, we test our boundaries, we deal with success, failure. We laugh, cry, get stressed, learn how to deal with stress, negotiate, juggle conflicting deadlines. We learn the art of getting your work done and getting noticed, without upsetting too many people; internally and externally (a tricky one), and so much more. It really is an all encompassing life shaping experience. Even on those days when you feel like you've just shown up and gone home; you've still learnt through immersing yourself in the environment. 

And, if you immerse yourself in a number of these different environments; commercial, not-for-profit, start-up, education; and in different countries, you see and do quite a bit in a compressed amount of time. By parachuting into these workplaces you experience a unique type of subculture. A subculture containing different workplace social norms, sometimes deep-rooted and created by the longest-standing employees. People who often believe these social norms to be universal, as this is their normal.

Every new environment brings a wave of fresh learning which you carry with you; some good and occasionally, some bad. 

My first encounter with this was aged 24. I had a decent job in sales and events at an incubator. I had worked there for three and a half years and proved myself enough to earn respect as well as privileges. Privileges I didn’t yet know to be privileges, because this was my first normal. I was allowed to start and finish whenever suited me and no one ever checked. Something I discovered was unbelievably convenient when in a later role I had a micromanager.

The reason I left those cushy privileges relates back to the title; to chase risk. As a 24 year old I was aware the job had an expiry date. A number of reasons accounted for this, but the main one was down to the growing hunger inside me. When I handed in my notice everyone thought I was mad, the role was exciting, I seemed to love it, the clients loved me and the money was very good for my age. But it was the right thing to do, and although I had regretful thoughts the first few months longing for my old private office and all the perks that came with it, once that passed, I never once thought to myself, you should have stayed there.

My most recent transition back to the UK from Australia to be a teacher has similarities. Again, my role in Australia in recruitment had become comfy, I knew everyone, I was good at the job, the money was good and it seemed as though I was on a clear corporate trajectory. But something wasn’t right, I was too comfortable. Again, that hunger grew and transcended itself as this huge life change. 

I probably don’t need to spell out to you the magnitude of difference between the culture of a recruitment company and a secondary school, they are polar opposites. You’re faced with people under very different pressures with entirely different motivations and values.

The risk felt real. When handing in my notice, driving to the airport, landing in Heathrow. Preparing for the 5 hour teaching interview. Participating in the 5 hour teaching interview. All these milestones heightened my sense of risk and I loved it. The stakes felt high and the reward higher. 

I write this exhausted from my first week of face-to-face teaching. The resistance to challenge has been inevitable, as much as the overwhelming feeling has been positive; I still fight back thoughts of ‘why, oh why did I do this again?’ Because it's cosy and nice in our comfort zone so naturally, we long for it. And, when we’re thrown out into the cold and left to fend for ourselves again, it feels scary and unknown. 

The point is - risk is what pushes us forward. It makes us feel alive and opens up opportunities for growth. It’s often said that change happens outside our comfort zone; and despite this overused phrase being slightly annoying, I do truly believe it. 

If I’d have stayed at my first job would I be the person I am today? No. Because I wouldn’t have experienced and been influenced by these multitudes of subcultures. Subcultures that have taught me valuable life lessons, educated, exercised and often, overwhelmed my ever changing and always evolving desire to chase risk.

I will leave you with a quote I heard on a podcast recently that really resonated (and isn’t overused);

“Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterwards.”

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