Chasing 2.0

Once upon a time I used to know a 13 year old boy who was convinced that he was destined to become something spectacular in life .

Then one day, he grew up.

Soon, the day slipped into years . And the years into decades . Until one fine morning when he looked into the bathroom mirror and found a stranger in there. A stranger who reminded him of a typical non-hero character out of a Woody Allen movie, someone who was standing at intermission and unable to account for the thousands of days that had slipped by, taking all his innocent and absurd dreams with them.

That 13-year old boy used to be me . Or maybe he used to be you. The you, you left behind – at misty bends and messy ends, as you went about earning your scars and chasing illusions you mistook for real life.

Time is indeed a queer commodity that is reconstructed in memories and deconstructed in regrets as it goes by. Most of us sleepwalk through our youth in trying to win some kind of identity . Then we stumble upon middle age & scramble to preserve that identity . And suddenly, standing at mid-point , we realize that somewhere in this medley of all the artificial races we were enlisting in, we have quietly let go of our greatness. Partly by default , partly by design. The first pangs of urgency hit us. We know this is no dress rehearsal. It is our own life that is gliding past. We straighten up and reach for it. 

In many ways, 2019 has been that year for me. The year of pause and reset. The year of recalibration so as to find my personal 2.0. Agree, it might not fetch me that Olympic medal or get me a phone call from Stockholm in this lifetime, but it should at least bring forth the best in the rest of me. Someone had written somewhere that one day in your journey, the you who you became will come face to face with the you who you could have been . This year, and in the years ahead, I have chosen to test this out with my personal toolkit, my realizations from having lived a life of sorts. At least I owe it to the 13-year old who I would like to see eye to eye as we shake hands on the other side of the finish line.

Here’s my 2.0. Do let me know if it matches with yours ?

1. Find your song – Like Rocky says, ‘Fighters fight..’. Likewise, painters paint. Poets write. You were born with your own song inside you, a song no one else can sing as well as you. Find it. Don’t show up at the finale with your song still unsung.
2. Toss it up – As we get older, we become suckers for conformity. We join the herd, and get trapped in time capsules that we legitimize as our rule book. And in the process, we lose our fluidity and edge. Find ways to toss your days. Every day is different. Each day has its unique flavor and rhythm. Discover it. Savor it. Live it.
3. Subtract your busyness – In today’s super connected world, it is very easy to get zombified by irrelevant chatter and numbed by FOMO ( fear of missing out). Get off the bandwagon of manufactured busyness. If anything really needs your attention, it will find its way to you somehow. You don’t need to check your phone every 30 seconds for that.
4. Be the best first hand You – When people talk of you in your absence, there should be 5-6 consistent things that they recall about you. That is your own personal brand. Work on it, nurture it and protect it. This is what should make people love and respect you beyond your day job title. In 2019, I de-linked my brand from my day job. Its not that I do not love my organization or my job. Far from it. But I prefer an identity that is my own. And I feel glad that I have so many friends, connections and well wishers out there who don’t care what I do as my day job.
5. Find your well – My favorite among Haruki Murakami’s many metaphors is the ‘bottom of a well’ thing , a place his protagonists often retreat into. We all need a well as we do our 2.0. This is where we need to disappear periodically, to lose ourselves in dark silence every day, so as to find ourselves better. You are not ready to deliver your swansong till you know all that you must know about you.
6. Don’t be the dinosaur in the room – Keep pace with trends & technology. There is no scientific evidence suggesting that our brains become less capable to embrace newness as we grow older. In fact, I think it is the reverse. We actually develop a wider perspective to apply new things as we have a larger platter of past experiences to draw from. Most people get stuck in the ‘good old days’ syndrome and squander off their precious 2.0 in cynicism and nostalgia. As the saying goes – The good old days were not that good. The good new days are here. And better days are coming.
7. Don’t be a corporate robot – Most people out there wake up, grimace at the morning news, eat breakfast, drive their Toyota Corolla to work , sit nodding in endless & pointless meetings, grumble about life's unfairness at the vending machine, ‘Like’ their boss’s stupid posts on social media, criticize Trump and Modi, go back home, watch TV and go to bed. Don’t be most people. Your 2.0 should be about finding your unique way to add value. To yourself, to your workplace and to the world you live in.
8. Find the smaller meaning of life – In pursuit of some unnecessary profound, we often miss the necessary ordinary. Each day is an opportunity to do our own small things for this world. Find few small things to do each day. If each of us took care of the small things, the big things will take care of themselves.
9. Stop chasing credit for the work you do - The world is a fair place. Every honest effort gets noticed, recorded and applauded in due course of time. Your time shall come.
10. Find your Zen - Human beings, by nature, are designed for stability and coexistence. This whole discourse on disruption is overrated and temporary . It will soon pass. And life will go on.
11. Get fit -If you miss your workout for a day, no one will notice. If you miss it for three days, you will notice. If you miss it for a week, others will notice. One of the things you need for an effective 2.0 is robust health. Respect your body. And it will pay you dividends as you slug it out there and compete in the relevance battle with people half your age.
12. Dress sensibly - Don’t buy skinny jeans. Donate your light coloured suits. No one might tell you so, but they make you look silly.
13. Decode love - In 2.0, you discover that love is not a few nice words from a Rumi’s couplet , but rather, it is a person we uncover as we grow older – in someone else, as well as in ourselves. Love during your first innings is often impulsive, hormonal & stupid. Love during 2.0 becomes something that grows & triumphs over time and circumstances. Make sure you love your partner. Also make sure you remember to tell your partner that you love her / him. Nothing silly in that.
14. Draw out your circle of dignity – Youth is about misadventures and compromises. Hungry to get an appreciative nod from the world, we keep making allowances. Each such allowance leaves us with a vague vacuum within, a discomfort we cannot explain . One of the things about 2.0 is plugging the vacuum by drawing your own circle of dignity, your personal code of conduct. This is the line you won’t cross, no matter how big the repercussions be.
15. The dude in the sky - Mark Twain ( in his 1916 classic ‘ The mysterious stranger ’) wrote – “Humanity has unquestionably one really effective weapon—laughter. Power, money, persuasion, supplication, persecution—these can lift at a colossal humbug—push it a little—weaken it a little, century by century; but only laughter can blow it to rags and atoms at a blast. Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.” Loosen up. Every once in a while, connect with your eccentric friends. Or with your own eccentric self. You are but just a speck in the scheme of the universe which again is only a speck in the larger scheme of a drama being scripted by that brilliant playright in the sky . Don’t take yourself too seriously.

 Live fair. Stay kind. Have fun. Finish well.

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