The Chaos of Parenthood and Hospitality

I’ve taken a few days off this week to spend time with the kids during their school holiday and to celebrate my wife turning the grand old age of 29! (Don’t tell her I told you).

Given the nature of the beast that is hospitality, it can be tricky to get any real time with the family all together. There’s always someone at school, nursery, or visiting the doctor’s office, etc. etc. (One thing they don’t tell you about kids before you have them is the number of bloody appointments you MUST have just to raise them ‘correctly’.)

I always thought evenings would be the best time to spend quality time with my wife, but I’m usually asleep before the kids these days. At least twice a week, I get woken at about 11 p.m. by a 1-year-old with her finger up my nose. But if they’re not tired, you can’t force them to sleep.

Parenthood: A Full-Time Job Without a Day Off

In many ways, being a parent is a lot like being a restaurant manager, especially when you have multiple children to manage 24/7. There’s no such thing as a day off. Sure, you can guide them, instil them with values you all agree are important, and encourage them to make their own mistakes, but at the end of the day, you’re the parent.

In the same way that you’re the manager. It all stops with you. If you screw up, it’s your fault. If they screw up, it’s your fault. Either way, you raised them.

And then there’s the barrage of sh*t they throw at you. I don’t think I’ve gone a day this past week without my 7-year-old telling me how much he hates me. One moment you’re kicking his ass at Monopoly, and the next, he’s thrown the box at your face and wishes you were dead. It’s like having a disgruntled guest in my house 24/7!

The Relentless Pressure

The thing is, though, no one cares. It doesn’t matter what you go through as a parent or a restaurant manager—the job still needs doing.

Sleepless nights? Abuse from guests? The 24/7 lifestyle? Lack of appreciation? The relentless pressure to do more, produce more, sell more, be more?

There are so many crossovers between the two! You can love it, hate it, or bathe in indifference. Who cares? The kids certainly don’t—and nor do the guests. They both have needs and demands, and they expect them to be met. You either meet them, or you don’t. The who, what, why, and wherefore is irrelevant.

When Your Best Isn’t Enough

Sure, you’re 19 hours into an AFD, your main supplier has imploded, and all seven staff members are sick at the same time. Or maybe your kid’s got some horrific rash, they want sausages but all you have is chicken, and their favourite teddy is in the toilet.

And…?

Sometimes, you can do your absolute best, and it’s simply not enough. Welcome to parenthood! Or is it customer service? Eurgh, the lines are so blurred!

The Power of a Moment

But there is one other important trait I haven’t mentioned yet: both your kids and your guests have the ability to change everything in a moment.

A kid can shout and scream and wish you were someone else’s parent, but 30 minutes later give you the biggest cuddle imaginable, and suddenly unicorns worldwide are pooping butterflies again.

In the same way that you might wish it was acceptable to waterboard a rude guest in the fryers for being a massive twat, the table next to them might be the sweetest, kindest couple you’ve ever met, and just like that, all is right in the world again.

With a little bit of love, gratitude, or appreciation, everything can change in an instant.

Parenthood and hospitality are more alike than we’d care to admit. Both roles come with sleepless nights, relentless pressure, and an alarming number of tantrums. Yet, whether you’re dealing with a disgruntled child or an irate guest, the job doesn’t stop. And despite the chaos, both can surprise you with moments of pure joy and appreciation that make it all worthwhile.?

In the end, it’s these small moments that keep us going—whether we’re raising kids or running a restaurant.