Changing the Purpose, Changes the Focus

In September 2012, I traveled to Monterey, California and attended the USPTA World Conference on Tennis. There were 850 tennis professionals there and many hours of great on and off court presentations. I had the opportunity to hear Dr. Jim Loehr speak on “The Only Way to Win”, a topic in which he has written a book of the same title. I would like to share a few thoughts from his presentation and my own interpretations. We all know that tennis is a great sport for a lifetime, but what if we use it to help build character in our children. We should make our goal to win or lose with respect and look at each match or practice as a journey and not a destination. Tennis is the #1 sport for building character in our children and it gives them strengths for a lifetime of success. Think about the factors facing our kids when we put them in a tennis match.

• They are all alone
• There are no timeouts
• There is a scoring system
• There is a ranking system
• There is no coaching
• Its one-on-one
• In tournaments, there are multiple competitions in the same day
• Opportunities to influence outcome by cheating exist
• No off season
• Both fine and gross motor skills required
• Variable climate
• No time limit

With these factors in front of them, think about the opportunities for children to grow in self-reliance and physical/mental stability. When removing the Win/Loss as the sign of success or failure, children develop much faster and appreciate the growth as they improve. What if we have a paradigm shift in thinking about junior tennis from:

Current

Purpose: To Win
Scorecard: Win/Loss Record – Ranking
Behavior: Do whatever it takes to win/improve ranking

Future

Purpose: To use tennis to build character = Win with Character
Scorecard: Integrity, honesty, respect for others, focus, patience, positivity PLUS Win/Loss Record
Behavior: Acting with integrity, honesty, humility, etc. as one attempts to win

I feel that putting character first will give kids (my 7 & 9 year old children included) the great strengths we should all strive to achieve. Because of this shift in purpose, imagine if other parents and children refer to your children’s moral character as kind, caring, generous, grateful, humble, truthful, dependable, loyal, authentic, trustworthy and possessing integrity. Because of the shift in focus, we can help our children mentally with self-control, creativity, wisdom, critical thinking, decision-making, punctuality, organization and to become a challenge seeker. We should all be so fortunate. Do I feel tennis is the only thing needed, absolutely not? Do I feel it is an integral part of character development? It certainly was for me and my parents. Why would we not want that in our children and the children we teach? What positive action will you do for your children and clients today? See you on the courts.