Changing a habit

Enabling the Teenage Brain - Blog 18??

Humans are creatures of habit.? We are a combination of the habits we have shaped, followed and are tied to.? These habits in turn influence the future experiences that we have, which in turn reinforce existing habits.? Some people argue that we are unconsciously directed to live in accordance with our established or formed habits.? Sports people are an excellent example of habit formation, their entire career is being able to sustain performance habits no matter the pressure they face, to be able to shift from practice habits to competition habits, routines, or practices.?

I was fortunate because I was born into a family whereby positive and progressive habits were taught to me.? I didn’t realise it at the time but now realise how lucky I was.? These habits were basic -? how to clean, cook, be organised, to strive, to accept failure as a step towards success if I kept on.? I didn’t realise it at the time, but these habits shaped a strong sense of self-reliance in me.? Perhaps the most important habit that I was influenced by was love.???

When I reflect on the last 9 years on working for NMT and all the experiences I have had, I more frequently wonder how I would have “turned out” if I had been born into one of the families the young people we support/enable were.? Especially those that have experienced abuse, drug use, neglect, absent parenting within their family environment.? My answer? I don’t know!? I will never know.?

One thing I do know, is that habits formed in our early life are very hard to change.? This doesn’t mean they can’t be changed, but it does take dedicated effort and for some, a lifelong focus on maintaining a new habit.???

Some years ago, I learnt a new approach to habit change called “Habit Replacement Technique” and I agree with its core learning point – habit change is less effective than habit replacement.? As stated above, people are creatures of habit, we would be lost without them and so the most effective way to change a habit is to replace one with another.? Take smoking cigarettes - many people who stop that habit often start another one such as eating or chewing gum (or they can now swap cigarettes for vapes).???

So, why are habits so hard to change?? By their very nature they are very common activities or actions, they have a high frequency of occurrence.? For example, the ability to drive a car becomes a habit.? When we first start driving each action needs focus, but once the habit is established, we can perform all the functions needed simultaneously and without conscious thought.? The mind automates common tasks, actions – hence they move from conscious to unconscious management.? Habits are generally formed in three broad phases:?

1 Conscious and unconscious incompetence – I can’t drive a car?

2 Conscious competence – I can now drive a car?

3 Unconscious competence – I can now drive a car without thinking.?

Once we become unconsciously competent in any given action, behaviour or task it becomes a habit – we do it without consciously thinking about it.? This is why habits are so hard to change.? Take riding a bike for example. Once you learn how to, it becomes a habit that is extremely difficult to lose, even if you don’t ride a bike for some years, you can get back on one and ride it – you don’t have to relearn the habit.???

To change a habit, we need to shape new neural pathways in the brain, so they become more used than the previous neural pathways associated with the old habit.? They eventually take over the old habit as its neural pathways recede in importance.? Repetitive reinforcement is the key to successful habit change – this needs to be consistent and constant and to positively reinforce the new habit that you want to see.?

Habit Replacement Technique Example?

A young person has a habit of persistently “poking verbal fun” at other students and especially those they know they will get a response (bite) from.? Why might the young person have this habit?? It could well be a learned behaviour – one or both parents may consistently and constantly poke fun at them, even consistently criticise – their habit of doing the same to others could simply be a learned behaviour/habit.?

So, how can we help them?? We need to:?

1 Identify what reward they get from doing so – this shapes the craving to keep doing it??

2 Identify what alternative reward might encourage them to adapt/replace this habit?

2 Reinforce any action they take that is helpful, useful, positive towards others and, if possible, reward them for those actions.???

The key challenge – we know through constant and consistent repetition habits can change – the mantra is repeat, repeat, repeat the reinforcement – BUT - we simply don’t know how long this might take ……. sorry!?

In summary – replacing a habit is far more effective than simply stopping a habit.?

Did anyone start the habit I suggested a couple of weeks ago? To write a daily gratitude diary?

David

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