Change Your Habits, Change the World

I have been writing about time management for 15 years now, more or less. So I’m familiar with most of the complaints about the subject. One I’ve heard a lot lately about the self-help genre in general is that it puts too much emphasis on the individual. Why encourage people to be more efficient (or frugal, or organized, or confident…) when the larger world is unjust??

Certainly, some examples could support this critique. Women are less likely to negotiate raises, for instance, and so store shelves teem with books on negotiation for women. The problem is that there is also evidence that women who do negotiate wind up viewed less favorably. Perhaps we boost our confidence…just to step into a patriarchal trap.

I get it. And yet the question of “Change ourselves or change the world?” isn’t really an either/or statement. We can do both. There is much we can’t control, but when people feel more in control of what they can control in their own lives, they are better able to shape the larger world. Good habits give us the energy and mental space to see beyond immediate crises and solve bigger problems — for ourselves and for others too.?

That is certainly the hope for some of the nine habits I suggest in?Tranquility by Tuesday , the book I am currently writing. Taken together, these habits can reduce the sense of being overwhelmed that keeps us wishing for change instead of working for it.?

When we plan our weeks ahead of time, we can identify priorities and make space for them. Maybe you know that attending local school board meetings would be a wise way to hold these leaders accountable. But you are not going to remember that any given meeting is happening and decide that you feel like going on a random Wednesday night. To make this happen, you need to identify it as important, put each meeting on the calendar, and figure out the logistics of going (or logging onto Zoom). With the meeting identified as a top priority, you can manage your energy that day so you can follow through on your intention. Without that planning? There’s a good chance you won’t.??

When we build in back-up slots — another Tranquility by Tuesday habit — we can tackle our top priorities even when life doesn’t go as planned. If you’re racing to finish an assignment that got displaced by a snow day (and school closure) earlier in the week, you might cancel that meeting with several younger colleagues you’re mentoring. When Friday is mostly open, since you purposefully build open space into your life, then you can put the spillover there. Despite the lousy weather, you will still be able to show those young colleagues how they can navigate into leadership roles too.?

Even habits that seem completely self-focused, like observing a bedtime and getting some physical activity each day, can have positive external effects in the hands of caring people. Sleep and exercise give us more energy. When we have more energy, we’re able to confront the injustices we see, rather than just hoping we make it through the day.

In short, if we do want to change the world, creating good habits in our own lives will allow us to be more effective. We can be happy warriors, rather than exhausted warriors whose good intentions don’t lead to much.?

So think about how the world should change. And then develop the habits in your own life that will allow you to help solve these problems. These two efforts are not at all in opposition. They compliment each other well.?

This article originally appeared in an email to my newsletter subscribers. You can sign up at https://lauravanderkam.com/contact/ .