Change

I just want to open and say that all the topics I am writing about are personal experiences; and the reason I am writing about them is because of the lessons I learned NOT because I always did the right thing, well I did sometimes, but because I didn’t and took the easy way out.

Anyone who knows me, is probably aware that the last 2-3 years of my life have been a fiery rollercoaster. I was up, then I was down, then I was up again… with all the shit and agony that comes with it. All of those experiences changed me as a man, a father, a son, a sibling, and a friend.

Then I took a minute and asked myself, “did I really change?”

A side note here to clarify: I don’t mean the small changes that happen to us as we grow older; like for instance, “as I grow older I find I have less patience for people who try to BS me” or “I used to like this now I like that” … those are not “change”, those are changes that happen to us over time and are a natural evolution or maturity (or something!! I am not a psychiatrist) … I am talking about a fundamental change that people, may or may not, go through. This means go to bed one night one way and wake up in another!

Do people ever change? What prompts people to change? Is that change long-lasting? Is the change for the right reasons? What if those reasons change? What happens then? Is the change only a means to an end?

Ok, that’s a bucketload of questions that, probably, no one knows the answer to.

All I can do, is talk about “moi” and my own experience. So back to the first question, did I really change? The honest to God answer is “No”, I am who I am, BUT here’s the caveat, and pay attention here because this is gold :) … what I learned is that we have many aspects or characteristics in our personality, and they surface depending on the situation we are in. It takes a lot of discipline and a lot of self-restrain to have the ability to take a decision to choose the path we want to follow. Are we going to take the righteous path? The path made of principles that lead to integrity, or the other one?!!! Remember my opening statement! :)

A change has to be real and for the right reasons. This is probably the most difficult thing to be done. The principle of cause and effect stops this from happening.

In my opinion, people don’t change… they are who they are.

A change is a result of a decision. People need to DECIDE how they want to conduct themselves moving forward and have the COURAGE and INTEGRITY to stay on the straight and narrow; and that, my friends, takes guts and a decent set of kahunas.

Well folks, this was my Verbal Breakdown for this week. Have a great week and see you in the next one.

Till then, keep it safe, keep it real, and keep it simple.

Ralph

Disclaimer: The views, thoughts, and opinions expressed in this article belong solely to the author, and not to the author's employer, organization, committee or other group or individual.