The Change in My Hello

During my 14 day quarantine for International arrivals, I had a great opportunity to do some serious people watching. I would often look out my window and imagine my feet touching the pavement and walking on the grass around the park. Initially I would make a joke about the sporadic rebels walking outside with their dogs, with their loved ones, or by themselves. Most of the time, they would have the sidewalk to themselves so they did not have to adjust their movement. But when there came a time where they were to cross path with another person, there would be a slight hesitation as to who would make the wide path around, eventually both would choose the wide path. Nobody would turn around to acknowledge that they both made a decision because of the virus. Did they say hello as they made their movements?

With each passing day I would imagine the reaction of people saying hello as they pass each other and how well it would be received. Not a long hello that leads to further conversation but just a hello to acknowledge that “I see you and I know you are doing your best.” This led to an internal reflection about all the times that I have said “hello”. I thought about all the times that I have said hello, the different contexts of my greetings: from the casual head nods, the quick dart of my eyes to acknowledge the presence of another, my outstretched arm for the handshake or dap, the lean into my hugs, and the anticipation of being received with equal enthusiasm of my greeting. Those instances where reflexive, normal and enjoyable. No thought went into it, a normal exchange of energy.  But now, the reality of our situation has changed how I view hellos and greetings. Do I want to force it out when I start walking outdoors again as I pass a stranger? How can I make it feel natural to create that feeling of reassurance that we will get through this?

I have had the opportunity to work and live in different countries with their own unique interaction style. The initial greetings have a rhythm that takes time to get used to, you eventually feel in control of how you decide to interact. We control the way we decide to interact with others and the environment that we are in. In order to flatten the curve, there is a recommendation of physical distancing. The interpretation has been straight forward, keep your distance and make sure you severely limit the interactions you normally have. In our current climate, that control is forced onto us because it is currently the most reliable way for us to ensure the data being collected is as accurate as possible in order to understand what needs to be done next. We have to be extremely vigilante and deliberate about how we interact. Sadly or fortunately enough (depending on the context), I have not had the opportunity to say hello with the new rhythm of walking to avoid. It was a short walk but I am preparing to be even more aware of my hellos and to convey to the next person “hello, I see you and I know you are doing the best.” (A gem from the Art of Communicating)