Change, the Inevitable!!

C-H-A-N-G-E, the more welcoming and open-minded it sounds, the more discomforting and exhausting it can get.

As a simple example, let’s imagine, your everyday coffee mug, which you used for over a year, breaks into pieces. You happily buy a new one. The next morning you are excited to have coffee in your new mug. You make your coffee exactly the way you prefer. You take the first sip and you realise the coffee tastes the same but something is amiss. The comfort and the feel of your old mug is missing. You got used to your old mug and while the initial excitement of the new mug was high, it quickly died down. W-H-Y? The comfort of the old cup was replaced by the discomfort of new one. The weight, the design, the handle etc. changed the dynamics. Now for a while, may be you see yourself struggling a bit. Adjusting to the new cup is a struggle, the fingers passing between the handle, the feel of the cup in your hands, etc. Some differences are good while some are a bit discomforting.

With each passing day your level of comfort with the coffee mug increases. You soon forget about your old mug. The change in physical comfort eventually led to emotional satisfaction and fulfilment.

In our lifetime, we all come across many milestones like starting a college life, achieving financial independence, life time commitment and having a family and so on. As exciting this may sound, but at some point it demands us to change, adapt and TRANSIT

Even a small situation like the coffee mug demanded a TRANSITION period. Transition is, allowing yourself some time, some thought and a plan of action that would help you blend with the present conditions. It might involve trial and error, brainstorming, discussion, etc. until you reach a solution that is suitable to everyone.

Transition periods are likely to cause emotional and psychological stress like irritability, mood swings, worry, cluelessness, unpreparedness, distractibility, giving-up attitude, trust issues with self and others and so on.

A young college pass-out told me recently, i feel extremely nervous to go for job interviews, where tall office structure and working with people from A class profession is exciting, it is scary and anxious too. Mock interviews with my CA brother goes well, but during actual ones, i see myself drained out, stressed and lost. A thought of conducting myself diplomatically and politically correct is too much to deal with. I sense loosing out myself often.

I could understand, she was worried to lose her true identity of being honest, sincere, and non-manipulative person. She was worried, how well she will fit in the corporate structure. She was worried, is she prepared for the change? We need to understand that “CHANGE is inevitable” but the way we transition or adapt to this change is what makes “Change, the inevitable”.

The transition phase can be PLANNED through primary preparedness, judgement, understanding of direct and indirect exposure, evaluation of pro and cons and the time-frame needed.

Primary preparedness: - Basic understanding of the situation to be dealt, people in perspective, positives and negatives of the situation and people.

Judgement: - Your personal take on the situation based on your learning, experience, exposure and formal and informal feedback from others.

Direct and Indirect exposure:-

Direct exposure: - Any prior first hand experience as intern or anything related. Indirect exposure is have heard of it through a friend or a colleague who had direct exposure.

Evaluation of pros and cons: - plan A, B and C, possible favourable conditions and dangers posed, the risk level, external and internal support etc.

Time-frame: - deciding on the time frame that is needed to deal with event.

It is important to note, some changes are foreseen in nature while some are unforeseen. While foreseen changes allows enough room to plan while unforeseen ones can be more overwhelming and exhausting. Taking two steps back to have bird’s eye-view should allow better control over the situation.

With this young lady, she wanted to be herself, hence we agreed, she will take a chance and present herself in her unique way and learn from her own experience. In the upcoming interviews, she could feel herself at much ease and comfort. Over the time she was happy with her performance and was more willing to accept the corporate standards and yet maintain her uniqueness. She was still honest, sincere and non-manipulative but learned to give it back whenever needed. She conquered her journey of major CHANGE which earlier gave her restlessness and sleepless nights.

In stressful times, let’s focus on positively directing our physical and emotional energies, like,

• Indulging in a hobby
• Dealing with one day/moment at a time
• Talking it out

In tough times it is our resilience and the positivity we bring to any situation. It is our ability to transition and adapt to change that makes us stand strong in adverse situations.