Challenging the Negative
Many times, we can find ourselves listening to the negative thoughts ruminating in our heads. We have over 60,000 thoughts a day, so it's completely normal to hear our inner voice, but when we notice it's constantly negative, this is a good time to challenge those thoughts. Just because we are thinking something (even repeatedly) doesn't mean it's true. The good news is that you can become self-aware of and change these thoughts. Remember, "We are what we think'', so it's worth your time to become aware and learn how to challenge them.?
Questions to ask to challenge the negative thoughts.
1. Is this thought based on truth or fact? When we ask ourselves this question, we often realize the thought is based on fear or our past.?
2. Am I assuming the worst? That is easy for us to do. If this is the case, first, remind yourself that 90% of what you fear never happens. The next thing you can do is write out:
What is the worst-case scenario - just seeing it on paper usually helps us realize the worst might be bad, but it's something we can survive and grow/learn from:
What's the realistic case scenario?
What is the best-case scenario?
This helps us see the situation with clarity.?
3. Is this thought an old, outdated way of thinking? Sometimes, our thoughts are based on the past and who we were.?
4. What is the silver lining in the situation? Even if it's the worst-case scenario - what can you learn? How can you change? What could you do differently next time? How can you grow? There is always good, even in a bad situation. When we do the silver lining questions, we can see the big picture and remind ourselves this is temporary and will pass. This leads to the next question.
5. Will this matter 1 year from now? Will I even care or even remember what happened? We can hold on to anger for a long time, but do you want to? Is it worth it? Will it even be important in 6 months? 1 year? If not, let it go.
6. Is this thought helping me? Is it moving me forward? Is it helping me heal? Is there a benefit to what I'm thinking??
Early in Career Partner & Business Perspectives Lead
1 年100% agree! I often hear the risk of toxic positivity and then I'm wondering why there's little consideration for toxic negativity that's creating a downward spiral and keeping us stuck in negative thoughts. I really like the practical advice you give in the article ??
President & Owner of Premier Paralegal and Mediation Services LLC. and Adjunct Professor
1 年Awesome topic! I'm going to use a few of these passages for my management class that I teach. Especially when it comes to 90% of what fears you typically does not happen. It's great for building contingency plans on a management level. Thanks Diane!