Challenges in Life. Can BAD be GOOD?

It's easy to have a setback in life, something breaks, something doesn't go as planned... and this ruins your day. In business or in personal life, it can be disheartening.

My video shows our team CAPSIZING our dragon boat, at speed in the national Swedish competition. It wasn't planned, it could have ruined our day. Instead, it became a cherished memory.

In life, we always WANT things to work. We want to succeed. When it doesn't, we can feel like a failure. Like effort was wasted, opportunity gone. Or is it really so?

What if you discovered that failure is actually part of your success? That we can and should relish failure. Not only as normal and expected, but actually HELPFUL!

First, does life happen TO you, or FOR you? This is a critical mindset, that sets you up, for failure, or, alternatively failure SUCCESS. When you discover that life can and is all FOR you, then every failure is a helpful stepping stone to greater things. Rather than feel dejected and lose energy, if we see life as for us, then each failure is a gift.

This gift is specifically for you. Like Zaphod Beeblebrox, in a universe that has been created JUST FOR YOU. Each gift of failure is a life lesson. Learning. It is a challenge that is like exercise for your brain... exercise for your team... You want to build muscles for the greater challenge, so of course you need to work hard. In a gym, we feel the pain, as our muscles tear. Micro tears, literally your own body being torn. Yes it hurts, but the pain is also a signal, telling your body you want this part to grow stronger, so that future workouts don't tear your muscles as much. The body responds. As a result of the 'failure', the tears in your own flesh, they grow, building strength and tone and definition, helping you look good, helping you do more, helping you burn more energy in the right way.

If we think of failure in terms of exercise, then it becomes something expected, something to cherish, something to grow from. Not as a case of 'I wish that never happened', so much as 'I am thankful for this gift. Now what can I learn and grow from it?'

We certainly don't want to make the same mistake frequently, or make many mistakes, but mistakes are always going to happen, and fear of making them can be debilitating. It can hold you back. In my NeoMatrix team, we have a specific policy of encouraging the making of mistakes. We have mistake KPI's If you are not making mistakes, you are not pushing the edge. You are too focused on covering your ass than on leading the way, fearlessly building the next big thing. See our NeoMatrix co founder Tatyana, speak about mistakes and how important they are:

We should not be afraid of them, we should even celebrate them with others in the team.

Because we are celebrating learning, celebrating drive and passion, unbridled by fear... fear of making mistakes. Without the fear holding us back, we can build faster, feel happier and life and connect in ways that just don't exist when we are striving for perfect.

By redesigning our vision of perfect, we can incorporate failure into it, as stepping stones towards the goal. Things in life SHOULD be hard. We want them hard so other people don't just do our cool business idea. We want challenge, so we can feel good and proud. If success was handed to you on a platter, would you really feel the same? Could you grow if there was a light switch turned on, where you are instantly rich? Not likely. Lottery winners often fall foul of that mistaken idea of happiness, instant, unearned wealth doesn't bring happiness, and often the reverse. Rather, achieving a goal after struggle, this is what we should aspire to, not the easy path.

Of course we always work to avoid mistakes. We don't intentionally make them, but we should not FEAR making them. And when we do, we should say GREAT! How can we learn. How can we build better. How can we not make this (helpful) mistake next time?!

Fear of failure, and a culture that promotes 'mistake free' over fearless innovation, is holding you back, holding your organisation back, holding your happiness back.

In Sweden, in the national dragon boat competition, we were striving so hard to win the race. Pushing it, pushing it hard. In this race, we CAPSIZED! Which could be due to mischief, but no, in reality, it's sometimes an outcome of pushing so hard. But while we could look at this as failure, instead, it brought the team closer together. We all laughed. We looked at the learnings. We built memories on this experience.

Some may say the capsize was EVEN BETTER than actually winning the race. So the next time you feel failure, don't be dejected. Realise this is a gift. In a universe built just for you. This gift is something you can learn and grow from, and enjoy. Because it's not the mistake that matters. It's your response. Your attitude. How do you handle it? With passionate energy? Or dejected sadness. Only one of these polar opposites will propel you further into the success future, as the other is just holding you back!

Watch us capsize our boat here, and enjoy other paddling adventures https://youtu.be/CLrUtHpVAb4