CEO 5.0 Relationship Management For Leaders

In the last four articles, we had discussed about – importance of EI, self-awareness, self-management and empathy and how to develop it. This article is about the last quadrant of EI model designed by Prof. Daniel Goleman, i.e. Relationship Management.

“If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.” – African proverb

The last EQ domain that author Daniel Goleman identified is Relationship Management, and this is where, first three domains, already discussed in the previous articles – Self-Awareness, Self-Management and Empathy, all converge. By applying these three competences, we can be aware of what effect other’s have on us and how do we manage our emotions, in order to interact empathetically to achieve the desired outcome. How can your employees impact and influence healthy connection and team spirit in all their relationships is something they need to understand. Only by managing healthy relationships, both at personal or professional front, people find fulfillment, success and joy at home and at workplace. However, the word ‘Managing’ should not be confused with ‘manipulating’ or ‘controlling’.

Q: What is Relationship management? Ans.: It is using your awareness of your own emotions and those of others to manage interactions successfully. Relationship management involves clear communication and effective handling of conflicts. It is the bond you build with others over time.

Q: What are Relationship management skills? Ans.: It includes – Assertive communication, Decision Making, Adaptability, Problem Solving, Inspiring Leadership. As experts have put, Relationship Management is all about your interpersonal communication skills, your ability to inspire and influence them, your ability to communicate and build bonds with them, and your ability to help them change, grow, develop, and resolve conflicts.

Q: What are the practical advantages of Relationship management skills? Ans.: There are many direct benefits – Trust among team and outside stake holders, Focus on solution, Speedy implementation, Easy navigation in the dynamic micro and macro business environment, Improved customer service, Promoting an innovative culture, Reduction in employee turnover and Healthy emotional climate in the organisation.

Q: What is the one thing that we can ‘start’ doing and the one thing that we can ‘stop’ doing, to build Relationship management skills? Ans.: START – Trusting, motivating and inspiring internal and external customers. STOP – Looking at people as commodity

Relationship Management allows you to connect with others in ways that helps them feel understood and supported. Managing relationships is an essential emotional intelligence skill that enables you to effectively lead change or to manage personal change.

Managing relationships is much more than just being friendly. It takes immense efforts and intention (and some strategy) to get the best from a situation and manage the way people respond. In his (highly recommended) 2002 book, “Leadership” Rudy Giuliani (Mayor of the City of New York: 1993 - 2001 and Time 2001 Person of the Year) observes, "Sometimes very different people will form a harmonious unit, while those with a lot in common can't be in a room together" (p. 111).

The competencies of relationship management are often associated with leadership because these are obvious areas we typically associate with leadership. Leaders find ways to inspire and motivate by tapping into people's values and desires. They also find ways to align these with the needs of the business. Using empathy and other EI skills leaders are able to build and maintain high levels of trust.

One of the most toxic ways that poor Relationship Management manifests at workplace is through gossip. Talking about others behind their backs is a common practice in most workplaces today, but it is killing collaboration and culture of the organisation.

Relationship Management does not involve merely understanding its components. That’s merely an intellectual element that won’t help an individual much in his/her day to day routines. So, you need to keep on practicing the skills of Relationship Management, and all it takes is time, effort and know-how. But the know-how is “EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE”. CEOs who expand their Personal Competence of Self-Awareness and Self-Management can also outshine at Social Competence, i.e. Listening Skills, Empathy and People Skills. By leveraging these Personal and Social Competences, CEOs build long-term, strong and trusting relationships at the organisation and with external stake holders.

Next is the last article in the CEO series of 6 articles on Emotional Intelligence, will be focusing on the most important aspect, i.e. developing the Emotional Well-Being, in self and in others.

Article By: Prof. Vipul Vyas, HR Facilitator and Life Coach, Director, Mann – The Mind, Mumbai