The cauldron of emotions: and what we can learn from this

We have all seen the exciting end to the World T20 final- wow, what an amazing contest it was! And we have also seen hundreds of posts on the strategies and skills of the teams, and even a larger number of posts on the leadership learnings, or rather life lessons, from this match.

Now that all the euphoria and hype is slowly subsiding, I wanted to reflect on something that we may not always see, but pervades everyone’s life, and more acutely, a sportsperson’s life. Emotions! Before you give that wry smile and say ‘Et, tu?’, I can tell you this is different! (I can now picture Javed Jafri saying ‘Its different!’ in his trademark way in the Maggi hot and sour ketchup ad- where have all those lovely ads gone?) But seriously, looking at emotions more deeply throws some great insights.

As India won the match, you probably could clearly see many emotions, and perhaps not see some others. You could see great happiness amongst the Indian players. But maybe there was a sense of relief as well. When Rohit lay down, one could see a feeling of momentary relief – desperately yearning for this success for a long time and being under some pressure in the match, there would certainly be a feeling of relief! And the emotion of happiness gives way to the emotion of pride, when you look at the context in which the team achieved this win- coming through a tough period in this match, and on the back of a unbeaten campaign, with a history of great expectations. That significant achievement brings forth this feeling of authentic pride (as opposed to the feeling of ‘hubristic pride’). And as they soak it in, and meet with the coaching team and their own families, one can sense an emotion of gratitude- to your teammates, to the coaching staff, to your family, and to others who helped you. So, they all probably went through these emotions- happiness, relief, pride, gratitude. Some of it is visible, some of it is expressed, yet some of it may be just under the ‘surface’. You can see tears of joy, you can see smiles, you can see the jig, and then the hug. These are emotions in their extreme intensity.

Now imagine the emotions in the South African team. There is obviously sadness, and disappointment when they think how close they were to victory. For some, it could also be a feeling of regret- a feeling of ‘if only I didn’t do that’. And perhaps, for a few there could be a sense of anger- just momentarily. At themselves or at some others. You could see tears of sadness and disconsolate faces. When they meet their team mates and pat and hug each other, you can see emotions of compassion or sympathy. And maybe, slowly, over some time, an emotion of some pride on how far they have come.

Now step back twenty minutes from that last ball. Now imagine the emotions that the players were going though. Having tonked Axar for huge hits in the earlier over, maybe Klassen felt confident. Maybe some of the Indian players were a bit tense. Maybe a bit fearful of what could happen. A wicket falls and another, and now the South African batsmen are going through the emotions of nervousness, tension, fear. As Miller falls to that brilliant catch, the Indian players are now slowly feeling a little more confident. And Maharaj and Rabada a little more nervous.

And what might have been the emotions as the match started. On both sides- one of hope, optimism, and maybe confidence. Maybe even some nervous tension.

As you reflect on this cauldron of heightened emotions, just imagine the kind of emotions people go through every day- and often we neglect to sense those. While we say intense emotions in the match, given the context, each of us also goes through some emotions in our everyday life. Sensing the emotions in others is a skill we all should build. ?We all experience a heady of mix of emotions – and these can spur action or even deter action. Emotions are nothing but automatic feedback to you about something in the environment, unconsciously and swiftly scanned by your brain and given to you. I guess the first step in our effectiveness is to acknowledge these emotions and quickly check why you might be feeling it. The next step is to deal with it and leverage it. On numerous times, it helps you. At other times, you have to use your thoughts to bring a balance in your emotions before you act. But having different types of emotions is natural and normal (The Pixar movie Inside out brings this out very nicely)

Which brings me to two statements I heard on the management of emotions. Bumrah, in his interview, mentioned that if you think too much into the future, then emotions come in the way. His way of coping is to acknowledge that, but he copes by staying in the present, focussing on that particular delivery.

The other statement I heard was Rohit mentioning how Rahul Dravid had to control some of his natural instincts and emotions, and work with the young players- listening to their hopes and challenges, sensing their emotions, and helping them being at their best, but yet consciously managing his own emotions. A coach has a tough job- to put others in front and hold back your ‘ego’ and manage your emotions. I guess there is no better person exemplifying it than Dravid.

Well, translating the ‘learnings’ (ouch!) from this emotional roller-coaster of a match, to our daily lives, here are a few key points we might consider:

1.?????? We all go through a range of emotions. While we saw the high intensity emotions at the end of the match, at times we may not feel that intensity. Some of the emotions may be latent and not in an activated state. See the circumplex of emotions that James Russel articulated in 1980, across two axes- Valence and Arousal. There is a spread from negative to positive emotions, and across a range of ‘activation’. However, to be an effective leader, we have to build the skill to sense emotions- in ourselves and in others

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2.?????? The next step is to learn to deal with those emotions. Firstly, understanding and processing the emotions you feel in yourself- and in the context of the situation, decide how you might respond and the action you should take. Bringing your awareness of context and the end result helps you take the right actions- rather than responding to the ‘raw emotions’. In many cases, as Bumrah articulated in his interview, you go back in time to a similar situation, and bring those past successes to help you manage your emotions at a crunch time.

3.?????? As we deal with others, learning how to leverage the emotions in others will help us be more effective. You need to create processes for people to authentically share emotions, in a safe space, and thereafter help them with the right actions so that you have the right ‘group emotions’ when you get to facing your challenges. Rohit Sharma and Rahul seem to have done a great job of this. As leaders, there are moments when we need to engender a particular emotion in our team. Emotions of compassion and gratitude help in team work and collaboration. And as the team works on a tough project, ensure that there are emotions of hope and optimism. Look at every context and see how you can bring about the appropriate emotions in your team through your words, and actions and right processes.

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PS: Speaking of ads, not sure if its only me or the channels that I watch, but I somehow feel that we don’t have as many memorable ads as we used to have a decade back. Is it the digital disruption- but those lovely ads of the past- the Titan ones, Wah Taj ft Zakir Hussain, Lalitha ji ad for Surf, Rin (meri safedi uski safedi se achha ??) Surf Ultra's dirt is good, etc.

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