Caught in the Middle: The Sandwich Generation Struggle

Caring for young children while supporting ageing parents is the daily reality for the Sandwich Generation – people in their 30s, 40s, and 50s who juggle the needs of two generations while trying to maintain their own wellbeing. For many, burnout feels inevitable as the relentless demands of caregiving leave little room for self-care.

The Hidden Burden

Caregiving is an act of love, but it’s also emotionally and physically draining. Women, in particular, often bear the brunt of the invisible mental load – the unseen yet exhausting task of managing family life. From coordinating doctor appointments and planning meals to ensuring school projects and playdates happen smoothly, this behind-the-scenes work leaves many feeling perpetually "on duty."

Adding to the strain, caregivers often act as emotional anchors for both their children and ageing parents while navigating their own mental health challenges. This dual responsibility can feel overwhelming, leading to high rates of anxiety, depression, and burnout.

A Modern Challenge

The Sandwich Generation faces unique pressures that didn’t exist in the same way for past generations. With people having children later and living longer, the overlap of caring for both kids and ageing parents is more common. Unlike in the past, when extended families often shared caregiving responsibilities, today’s caregivers are navigating these demands in smaller, more isolated family units while balancing careers and fast-paced modern lives.

Practical Ways to Cope

Without adding more to your already full plate, here are strategies to help manage the load:

1. Practice Self-Compassion: Inevitably, you may feel inadequate or guilty for not doing "enough." When this happens, remind yourself you’re human and doing your best. Treat yourself with the same kindness you’d offer a close friend.
2. Understand Your Energy: Pay attention to when you feel most energised and allocate demanding tasks to those times. Knowing what recharges you (like quiet time or brief naps) and what drains you (emotionally intense conversations or physical tasks) can help you plan more effectively.
3. Ask for Help: Lean on your support systems, whether it’s family, community resources, or professional caregivers. Asking for help is not a weakness – it’s a way to share the load and care for yourself.
4. Take Recovery Breaks: Even small moments of rest – a 10-minute walk, a quick stretch, or quiet reflection – can recharge your energy and resilience for the next task.
5. Seek Emotional Support: Share your challenges with trusted friends or a therapist. Talking about your struggles can lighten the emotional weight and provide clarity to tackle problems.

By prioritising your wellbeing, you’re not just helping yourself but ensuring you have the strength to support your loved ones. While this phase of life is challenging, with the right tools and support, it’s possible to navigate it with greater balance and peace.

Dr. Saliha Afridi?

Chairwoman & Founder, of The LightHouse Arabia

22 November 2024