Casady: My Lifeline to the Future

Where Do We Find the Origins of Leadership?

??????????????????????? ????"Leadership and learning are indispensable to each other."?

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? “If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, then you are a leader

-John Quincy Adams

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Maybe I Think Too Much

Many years ago, I had a therapist, originally from South Carolina, who told me in his Southern twang: “Bee-un. Ah thank yew thank too much.”? Hmm…maybe he was right. I never thought a person could think-or “thank” too much for that matter. But I guess I do. One thing I do think about a lot is the crisis in leadership today. I do believe that we have an existential crisis in our country and globally. I have been very lucky to have studied and worked with some very smart, insightful people-leaders- in some great organizations, especially Disney and the US Fire Service. Honestly, I don’t know how I got there but, hey, I’ll take what I can get. Working in both the private and public sector provides a great diversity of? platforms of observation and study. But where does leadership actually begin? It’s like trying to find the headwaters of a mighty river. So, I began to think about… where I “began.” In my experience there is only one word: Casady. “What’s that?” I am sure you are asking. “ I thought this was going to be about leadership.” It is! Give me a minute. Casady is a prep- school in Oklahoma City. One of the finest schools in the nation.?

?We Tell Stories at Disney

You know we tell stories at Disney, and one of the stories I have always loved the Arabian story of 1,001 Nights. That is the memory I have of Casady. I carry that memory like an Aladdin’s lamp from those stories. I hold it tightly in my mind and heart, bringing it out only at special times, rubbing and? polishing it to a crystal shine; then carefully putting it back in that special mental drawer for a bit more thought, always with great care and pride. This is the memory I carry of Casady-now for well over half a century. It is more than a memory. It is a living guide that has informed my life with certain values and guidelines, some of which I have failed to uphold; others that have taken me places I could never have contemplated. It is at Casady that my young adult life began although I didn't know it. My experience at Casady imprinted my life, with the guidance I needed, leading me every step to my future. And that future was one of leadership.?

“Not Casady!”

My story began when I was 15 years old when my mother told me she thought it best for me to attend Casady. It would, of course, be my decision but she knew I'd make the right one. Not Casady!! The very thought of it struck fear in my young and unenlightened heart. Smart, rich kids went to Casady…and I was neither. But mom had a way… of? getting her way… when it came to these kinds of decisions-meaning I kind of had no choice. I got into Casady by the skin of my teeth. My first year can best be described as nine months of terror, offset by the tiniest glow of confidence and pride only by the last hour of the last day of the last class. My weekly ritual that first year was laying on my living room couch in my blazer and tie early in the morning before chapel, crushed with gnawing anxiety and doubt-sometimes literally shaking; pleading with my mother to call the local public school-John Marshall-to get me in-and out of Casady. “Just try to make it through the week. If you feel the same way on Friday, then I'll call John Marshall.” A wise woman-my mother. Luckily that day never came.?

Learning How to Study is Learning How to Lead

?I learned how to study, my days at Casady became a bit brighter in my junior year so that by the time I graduated I carried the pride of accomplishment that I had made it through Casady. Every difficult step was a piece of the mosaic that would give me the pattern of self-discipline, achievement and critical thinking that became the rock solid foundation for almost every area of my life, especially and eventually, leadership.?

The Day My Dad Cried

I carried the skills and love of learning from Casady into my undergraduate and graduate studies. I remember calling my father when I told him I was a Phi Beta Kappa. I heard him quietly weeping with joy over the phone- a certain gift from what I learned at Casady. I don’t think it is any kind of hyperbole to say that whatever I have been able to accomplish academically, professionally; sometimes spiritually, came from the foundation I received at Casady. That school gave me the vision to develop the essence of my own truth to make a difference for my family, the organizations I led, my country and our world. I felt that there was nothing I couldn’t accomplish because I had the tools from Casady. I feel the same way today at 74 years old.?

?What Can You Contribute?

Certainly, achievement and accomplishment have their rewards. But I have found that the most fulfilling rewards came as a by-product of a simple word: contribution-to our families, our communities, our country, the organizations in which we serve and to ourselves. Don’t ask what you can receive from others. Find out what you can give to all those around you. What can you contribute of yourself, your knowledge, experience, temperament, and passion? It is not necessary to be a great executive, or government official or statesmen, or scholar or athlete. Just be the best ‘you’ possible right now regardless of your age or position. . Don’t wait. Your future will find you. Just remember who you are and what you represent.

?Character Over Achievement…Then Leadership

The development and maintenance of character will always be more important than achievement. Think “Be” first, then “Do.” We are human beings. Not human “doings.” Try to know who you really are. I can tell you it’s a life-long quest. And it should be as each of us changes and grows. I have also found that, regardless of how much we achieve, there is no place for egotism in the character equation. There is no right way to do a wrong thing. Yet, we are human, and we do wrong things. I have a ton of them. Of course, admitting our errors quickly, asking for forgiveness is a hallmark of character, but it’s only one part of the equation. What amends will we make? What actions can we take? Mea culpa does not equal correctio, certainly not in our society but especially in our families.?

Leadership Always Begins with Values

The essential DNA of leadership and character resides in three values: honesty, integrity and accountability. These are not some platitudes. They are working definitions for our lives, and I can honestly say that I had to learn every one of them the hard way. Many of us don’t have to. This can be simple for some of us and complex for others. It should be simple. There is no such thing as” kind of honest.” That’s called rationalization: another word for BS. You are either 100% honest or you’re not. You either do what you say you will do, or you don’t. Dishonesty and loss of integrity are rampant in our society, and in the world. Yet the people who win in the long run are the honest people with integrity. If we can be those people we will save ourselves so much time and difficulty. You will never have to say things like: “I can’t recall,” or have to explain what you really meant, after you misspoke. Funny, I have only heard that word ( if it is a real word) from Fortune 500 CEOs testifying before Congress, or now, some Congress people themselves. If we? can live these values we will build unshakable reputations and progress in every area of our lives.

?Individual Leadership…Leads to Organizational and National Leadership

Our job in this lifetime is not to shape ourselves into some ideal that we imagine we ought to be, but to find out who we already are and become all of it we can be. Explore your own passion and follow it as far as it will take you, even to the dark places where that talent may lead. I have found so much truth in Eleanor Roosevelt’s prescient statement:” You must do what you fear. You must do the things you think you cannot do.” I have found for me that it was at those times-and there were a few and continue to be-that I was most fearful that I grew the most, sometimes kicking and screaming. I wish there were an easier way, but I have found that we just don’t get big rewards for small efforts. We must find our own truths now and live them bravely. Playing it safe is rarely really safe. I have tried that approach too. In fact, I have invented new and ingenious ways to try to play it safe and failed. But with faith in a higher power and the foundation I received at Casady, my failures and fears took me places I never imagined, but I didn’t know it at the time.?

?We are Our Brothers’ and Sisters’ Keepers

The greatest need today in our society is for strong, empathetic leaders of character who can exercise sound judgment and act for results, especially to help other people. We are our brothers’ and sisters’ keepers. Many people in our society are hurting. We can help them regardless of the studies or the profession we choose if we develop a strong sense of empathy. Leadership at any level carries responsibilities. One of the key attributes of leadership is that you do what needs to be done to fulfill the mission of those you lead…no matter what. When public servants like fire fighters take an oath it means they do what they swore to do to complete the mission.? Not one firefighter from the FDNY said: “ Hmm..I don’t know” when told to go up into the World Trade Center on 9/11 to save lives and fight that impossible fire, even though they surely were thinking it. Who wouldn’t?? There will be many times when you will not feel like it or that you don’t think you can do it. Just take it as far as you can.?

?Never Let People Tell You What You Can’t Do

With a dream, enthusiasm, a flexible plan, and crazy perseverance take your dreams and goals as far as you can. Expect to be scared. It goes with the territory. Even if you fail, you will have won because you will have faced your fear, strengthening you for the next challenge. The great Rabbi Baal Shem Tov said: “If you must fall, then fall. Who you become will catch you.” You will have gained resiliency. Most people do not. They look for what they think is the easy comfortable way. Conquering self is neither easy nor comfortable, but it is the high ground of character and the key attribute of leadership.?

?Every one of Us Can Be a Leader

We can all be leaders, even if we are leading ourselves. It’s our choice. Each of us is a leader of one and sometimes a leader of many. But always a leader as challenging as it may be, and as much as there is a need for leadership in our society. The time of testing will be when you are sure you can’t handle something. And it may be something that you always wanted. What will you do then? You will do what your values and the foundation you received at institutions like Casady tell you to do. How would you act as a leader if you knew your life depended on it? In the fire and emergency services it can and does, many times.

?“Send Me”

Casady gave me the foundation of those values. The world can be a chaotic place. The world needs our unique answers to its questions and challenges. The day may come for any of us at any time when the verse from Isaiah 6:8 will confront us with a choice: “And the Lord said: “Who shall I send and who will go for us?” Will you answer that call? Will you answer that call, saying: “Send me?” “I’ll go. Send me.”

Our global- and certainly our national- society needs leadership now like never before. That kind of leadership begins in schools and institutions like Casady. It is never too soon to learn to be a leader. Those of us who went to Casady had the good fortune to build a foundation of timeless? leadership principles. God knows, we need them now more than ever.?

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