The Career Lesson I'll Take From My Experience Being Single

In three days, my 38-year-and-10-month journey of being single will officially end, as I’ll be getting married this Saturday in New Haven, CT.

Although I’m not writing today about my upcoming marriage or to humblebrag about my wedding (although, who am I kidding, I’ll take any congratulations because it’ll give me a short shot of social media serotonin and isn’t that what life is all about?).

What I’d really like to do is reflect on my time being single. And the career lesson I’m taking from it.

Here’s the deal – at least for me, once I got over the age of 30, being single didn’t feel too cool anymore. It felt, at times, like something was wrong with me. Like I should be with someone. Like, somehow, I wasn’t complete.

(By the way, none of that is true.)

Not exactly a new idea, the thirty-something who pretends to be cool with being single even though they aren’t. Hollywood calls that “the basis of every romantic comedy.”

But here’s the career lesson. My 30s was the first time in my career I had this thing called “disposable income.” In my 20s, I never made more than $43,000 a year, and barely was getting by. In my 30s, that changed, and I was able to go on cool trips, meet interesting people, and eat new foods.

I’m happy of all the adventures I went on and all the experiences I had. Although, if I’m being honest, I wasn’t always in the moment. At times, I felt bad being single, and would think it would all be better once I found someone.

I had a conversation with my soon-to-be wife the other day, who is my same age. And we both said the same thing:?

• If we would’ve known we were going to meet the person of our dreams eventually, we would’ve enjoyed our 30s more.
• And, if we would’ve known we weren’t, we would’ve enjoyed our 30s more.

Cut to the career lesson.

Is my job perfect right now? Not really. It’d be easy for me to say, “it’ll get better when...”.

That’ll rob years from my life. The reality – there’s a lot of learning I have in front of me right now. And there’s a lot of joy in front of me, too.

One of the best pieces of career advice I’ve gotten is “bloom where you’re planted.” I think that makes a lot of sense.

So, the career lesson I’m taking from my single experience: How do I make the most out of where I am right now?

I mean, it’s all I got.

I recently wrote a book, How I Found Peace: 14 Revelations That Cleared My Mind . It’s a practical and honest guide to finding inner peace in today’s world – you can get it here .