Can’t Go Home
Hello and good day!
I chatted a few days back with a gentleman who came into our chocolate shop.
His hands were covered in paint, his jeans were dirty, and he wore light brown work boots.
I’ve seen him several times before.
He usually takes a hot chocolate with whipped cream and the whipped cream sticks to his unkempt grey mustache.
I’ve only ever seen him buy our milk chocolate caramel peanut bars and he did so this time as well.
He brought the box up to the register and laid it down on the counter.
“I like your music,” he said with a thick Hispanic accent.
He took another sip of his hot chocolate, set it down, and wandered alongside our counter for a sample.
“It’s El Trio Los Panchos,” I said.
Because of the way I pronounced the name of the group, with a passable Spanish accent, the man instinctively responded in Spanish.
“Ya lo se,” he said. “I know.”
Slow acoustic guitar floated out from a speaker that we had placed on top of a tall shelf in the corner.
“Be-sa-me. Besame mucho,” sang the trio.
“Kiss me. Kiss me over and over again,” in English.
If you’d like to hear some beautiful Spanish language love songs, check out El Trio Los Panchos.
The man came back over to the register.
We picked up our conversation in Spanish. It came naturally.
“You like this product huh? You always get it,” I said.
“My daughter loves them, and I like them too,” he said.
“How old is she?”
“She is 17.”
“You eat these together?”
“Yes. It is a special treat for us. She’s leaving soon so I am bringing these as a present.”
“Where is she going?”
“She is about to graduate high school and she is going to Mexico to be with my family for a while.”
“Will you visit her while she is down there?”
“No,” he said.
Slow, beautiful guitar from the speaker, and harmonizing so slow and yearning and lovely that it breaks your heart.
“How come you aren’t going?” I asked.
As soon as I asked, I already knew.
He took a sip of his hot chocolate and looked at me, trying to decide whether he should say it out loud.
“Pues, me faltan papeles,” he said. “I don’t have papers.”
I rang him up.
He tapped his card on our card reader.
“How long have you been in the US?” I asked.
“30 years,” he answered.
“How old were you when you came over?”
“16.”
Besame Mucho ended.
Cielito Lindo came on.
The trio sang the first verse about the beautiful brown skinned girl with the brown eyes who comes down from the mountains.
“You’re more American than Mexican by this time,” I said.
“That’s what I think too. I’m both,” he said.
“Why’d you come over in the first place?”
“I was young. I ran away from home to make some money.”
“And you’ve been here ever since?” I asked.
“My kids were born here. If I leave, I can’t come back.”
“Do you miss home?”
“I don’t miss it as much. This is my home now. But I miss my mom. I haven’t seen her or touched her since I left. We only talk on the phone.”
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“Have your kids been to Mexico before?”
“No, the oldest one, my daughter, will be the first.”
“Will she see your mom?”
“Yes, they are going to stay together. Imagine. My daughter will see my mother before I can.”
The famous chorus from Cielito Lindo came on.
We listened. He sipped from his hot chocolate. I just stood there.
Ay, ay, ay, ay,
Canta y no llores,
Porque cantando se alegran,
Cielito lindo,
los corazones.
Ay, ay, ay, ay,
Canta y no llores,
Porque cantando se alegran,
Cielito lindo,
los corazones.
Ay, ay, ay, ay,
sing and don’t cry,
heavenly one,
for singing gladdens hearts.
“It would be nice if you could go together,” I said.
“Yes. Maybe we’ll go together some day. Thank you for the chocolate.”
“Thank you too my friend, for coming in.”
There is going to be a lot of talk about immigration in the coming elections and rightfully so.
But a very big and important nuance is likely to be left undiscussed.
There are tens of millions of illegal immigrants in the United States who have already been here for decades.
They’ve been working and living and raising children and taking care of their families and contributing to the economy.
They’ve been perfectly good neighbors and highly productive members of our society.
By now, they are every bit as American as whatever their original nationality was.
A baby born in the United States today will have full legal privileges of citizenship.
Meanwhile a guy who has been working his tail off painting houses in the United States for 30 years, who likes hot chocolate, and caramel peanut milk chocolate bars from Fortunato Chocolate, and who buys gifts for his 17-year-old daughter, can’t even get home to see his mom because he won’t be let back into the country where his wife and children live.
There is a distinction between this type of individual and the new folks who are currently coming over and causing problems.
I mention this because it would be easy to lump all immigrants together when in reality there are serious qualitative differences within the broader category.
Also, allow me to point out one of the greatest benefits of being an American citizen.
You can go just about anywhere in the world with nothing more than your passport.
You don’t have to fill out complex paperwork to visit Mexico or Peru.
There is no application process.
You don’t have to hire an immigration attorney or travel to the capital city to be interviewed by an immigration agent in a consulate building.
If you are born in the US, when you are of age you can just go on over to the post office, fill out a one-page form that takes 2 minutes to complete, wait a couple of weeks, and you’re ready to jet set off to the far reaches of the globe.
We’re no more naturally deserving of seeing the world than other people are.
Most of us in the United States just happened to be born in a place where we stepped into this tremendous advantage as a birthright.
Gratitude is certainly a healthy and important feeling given the circumstances.
And it is essential to remember that this issue requires nuance so as not to bunch people into too large a category.
I am sensitive about this topic because both of my brother in laws have been denied tourist visas in the past and also, we get a ton of Hispanic immigrants coming into our shop who are excellent people and paying customers.
Thank you so much for your time today.
I hope that you have a truly blessed day!
Adam