Cancel culture
We live in a world where canceling plans is the norm. Feeling a bit tired? Cancel. Feeling down? Cancel? Feeling busy? Cancel. It is so easy to find “self-care” advisors to back you up and encourage you to sit on your couch and watch Netflix if you don’t feel like going to your friend’s birthday dinner or your cousin’s barbecue. A quick google search is all you need to find a list of the best excuses to give when canceling, how to cancel without being a jerk, and on and on.
But what if we turned that thinking on its head?
Next time you’re considering wavering on a commitment, consider this instead:?
1. It is well known that too much choice can leave you depressed. With that in mind, the ultimate in self-care is to take the “should I go?” option off the table. Unless you are sick or have an unexpected and serious conflict, show up and make your word mean something.
2. Great things can come from showing up. It isn’t often that you leave an event or come back from a trip thinking you shouldn’t have gone. When we show up, serendipity happens; social interactions help you make new connections, strengthen existing ones, and open you up to new ideas and resurgent energy.
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3. Put yourself in their shoes. You have experienced the disappointment that comes from being canceled on at the last minute. Don’t be the person that causes that feeling for others unless it is necessary. (See #1 above!)
4. Your ability to keep a commitment reflects on your character. Think about the kind of person you rely on - are they the type to frequently cancel or are they predictably reliable? Choose who you want to be.
5. In the pandemic years, things get canceled constantly for legitimate reasons. Save your cancellations for the inevitable times when they will be necessary.
It all adds up to this: When you are in the planning stages and you feel a sense of dread, abort the commitment before it is made. Say no to the plan you don’t want and yes to the plans you do. Then you can leave the “should I go?” question out of your life for good.
Sr. Registered Financial Advisor Associate at Regional Financial Services Co.
2 年"Your ability to keep a commitment reflects on your character."
Great article
Self-Care Expert - Keynote Speaker - Bestselling Author - Certified Life & Career Coach, Yoga & Meditation Teacher - Host of Erica Diamond Podcast - Founder Bliss Essential Oils, and Busy To Bliss Membership
2 年Loved this!! I’ve tried to also raise my kids to stick to their words- and commitments. It comes back to integrity. Great piece!
Founder at SheMoney + Investor + Former Partner, Goldman Sachs
2 年I had a mixed response to this article. On the one hand, you are so right. I think we should be good to our word and yes indeed, great things happen when you show up. As a big planner of events it burns me to know end when people just don't show up. But cancelling with lots of notice, or as much notice as possible, is something else. I lost my dad a few months ago and honestly, the grief is like a tidal wave at times. I have had to cancel many a gathering because I am just too sad to be with people. I have learned that we never really know what is going on with people and being as understanding as possible is always a good thing.
Cognoscenti - Sourcing experts that help you win. Any topic, anywhere on earth | Aspen Fellow
2 年Oh you have nailed my pet peeve today.....I have such a hard time trusting anyone once they've reneged on a commitment. Its so core to one's brand to be reliable, ethical, good for your word......and yes, often the things you felt least like doing opens a new door for you! Just reward for honoring your commitment!