Can You Take a Compliment?

Can You Take a Compliment?

Originally posted?November 8,?2021


When facilitating live communication workshops, one of my favorite exercises is asking the group to go around the room and find a partner. When they are with their partner, they each share with the other something they admire about them.


They each have a minute to share, then move on to their next partner until everyone has received and shared something positive about one another.


After completing the exercise, I asked each person whether giving or receiving compliments was easier.?Most people say it was easier to give than receive.??


When YOU receive a compliment, do you defect or embrace it???


There are three reasons we deflect compliments, starting with?our upper limits barrier of being fundamentally flawed?or not wanting to bring attention to ourselves. We have come to believe we don't deserve this and are not worthy.


If we believe we are not worthy, we self-sabotage our ability to continue growing and accepting our success and accomplishments and find ways to discount or not believe them.


We are perfectionists.

When you complete a project or create something, you are blind to the beauty or genius others see. You only see how it could be better, so you judge it as crap and do not believe or accept the praise.


We Lack Self-Compassion.

Most successful people are not the ones with the most confidence but who have self-compassion


From the words of Wilferd Peterson,?"Learn to love yourself, be gentle with yourself, for only as we have the right attitude towards ourselves can we have the right attitude towards others."?


"Lack of forgiveness causes almost all of our self-sabotaging behavior."

-?Mark Victor Hansen


David Rendall teaches that shifting from self-confidence to self-compassion requires embracing the 98-2% rule. He teaches that 98%?of what we do is OK. Don't let the 2%?destroy you. Learn to take anxieties and fears and turn them into creative energies.


Don't believe everything you think.?Something from your past may be screwing with your mind.?


More often than not, trust that praise or compliments come from the heart.?


When you receive a compliment,?SAY THANK YOU, SMILE, and embrace it like a kiss or hug. You've earned it,?and it deserves a positive response.


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