Can we learn to lead from love?

A few years back I had a very peculiar meditation. I don’t meditate often (I wish to get better) but one rainy October day I found it particularly hard to focus, so I decided to sit down for a session. What came through was not what I had expected — at all.

I was looking out into a misty landscape when suddenly, a man appeared. He walked toward me and stopped a few feet away. He had long hair and wore armor, and it was clear he was from a very different time. A sword lay loosely in the grip of his right hand but he didn’t appear threatening. Instead, I got the feeling he had come to deliver a message.

“What are you here to tell me?” I asked the man.

He didn’t answer. Instead, he looked down to where his left leg should’ve been. It was missing. Then he looked back up at me and without using any words, told me a story spanning longer and deeper than anything I’d ever heard.

Visions flashed before my eyes. I saw men as young as teenagers go into battle, scared and lost, only to return home broken and shattered. I saw missing limbs, blood-covered bodies, and terrified young boys. For those who had a chance to return home, women were waiting — partners, mothers, sisters, and lovers — with one important thing to offer:

Love.

The whole thing was over in a flash and I was left on the floor, stunned. I reflected on what this all meant. Why had this been shown to me? What does it mean that men of all times have been sent off to battle and what has it done to their innate ability to embody and feel love? Have they learned (generationally) to depend on women to provide it? And if this dependence exists, how may that have shaped our world today?

I’ve never shared this experience before and still don’t quite know what it all meant. However, the memory of the meditation surfaced when I began collecting inspiration for this IWD-focused newsletter, so here I am.

I’ll preface by saying I’m about to get a little off the beaten path here. This isn’t something I’ve read about in a book or even seen on social media. I’m basing this on a personal meditation and the reflective thoughts that followed. Therefore, take it with a grain of salt, and I also invite you to interpret it with me. What could this mean? Please share your thoughts in the comments below!

Leave a comment

Fear of love?

Throughout history, men have been forced to leave their homes to enter the battlefield. This, of course, doesn’t mean that women haven’t tasted the many flavors of pain, but the act of knowingly walking into battle takes another kind of shutting down. How else do you face murdering another? Or risk being killed yourself?

If there is a higher source of divine love, one could think that men - generationally - have lost touch with some of that divine. They had to for survival.

Let’s assume this is right, what does that mean for society today?

It would mean that the world is based on a generational lineage, going back thousands of years, of men being starved of their deeper source of love. That’s why women have been stripped of their power, excluded from decision-making rooms, bought for pleasure (and love), and left with little say in how the world should be run. They had something men had lost, something they desired, which often translates to one thing only — fear.

The world it resulted in is built on anger, revenge, and regret. We are looking at leadership and governance lacking the underlying qualities of deeper understanding and connection.

So where does this leave now knowing this divide exists?

Could we course correct? Could leadership be built on love? And what world could that lead to? Are we mature enough to heal our long-lived karmic inheritance of fear, anger, and regret to build upon a deeply caring world, with love as our guiding compass?

This Friday, March 8th, is International Women’s Day , a historical date commemorating the struggles of women for equality, justice, and their rights. But so far, most women have been celebrated for stepping up in a man-dominated world. One that is run on the values that men have created.

What would being a successful woman in a world shaped by “female” energies look like? Not one solely run by women, but a world that has learned to trust our deeper connection with this divine love source again?

Let’s explore.

1. Humming with life

First, we should aim to live in a way we hum with life. Only then should we open up to share. When we feel depleted in any way — emotionally, physically, spiritually — we better shut up. No good advice ever comes from those who run on empty.

Could we learn to love a world that asks for such leadership? Could we dare to ask for that leadership from ourselves?

Imagine making it your most important mission to nurture yourself - body, spirit, and mind - and do it for your country, people, and the world. Envision headlines saying “Mrs President was looking very healthy and vibrant during her last visit to El Salvador, we seem to be in for a good year!”

Conclusion: Leadership should mean acting from a place of highest good — for yourself, your body, your people, and the planet. A healthy world starts with a healthy you.

2. It takes a village

We all know the saying “It takes a village to raise a child” and it’s something I try to remind myself of often as I navigate early motherhood. But I recently saw something on Instagram that hit so deeply, I paused in my scroll. It said:

“It doesn’t take a village to raise a child. It takes a village to support a mother.”

Wow, how profound, and of course that’s right! Sure, we need input from others to shape a healthy and well-rounded child, but if a mother can feel seen and supported by the community around her, she is the one capable of fully being there for her little one.

This thought flipped my worldview so much that it stopped me in my tracks. I understood that I had attempted motherhood much like everything else in life. The “I can do it myself, I am capable and strong!” mentality that had run me dry so many times before.

But what does it mean to be capable and strong? Is it trying to do everything yourself and (most likely) failing, or lovingly receiving help from others and using that connection to the divine love to show up fully — to hum with life?

What kind of mother do you think a child prefers? What kind of woman do you think a mother wants to be? And what kind of leadership do you think the world deserves?

Conclusion: Support and inclusiveness create vitality and life force, which leads to healthy and strong leadership.

Share

Leave a comment

3. Interdependedness - can we learn to love it?

One day in my second trimester, my husband said to me,

“I will always think differently about women now. You never know — someone could be pregnant!”

My first trimester was hard. It honestly felt like I was hungover from morning till late afternoon for eight weeks straight. Naturally, it came with its fair share of moody comments, which my husband duly noted. But being pregnant also brought a whole new fascination for the female body - it’s truly remarkable what’s going on in there - and I know that I, too, will never look at women the same again. We are strong, magical, and powerful in many aspects of those words. But we’re also soft, fragile, and sensitive. We whisper and we roar (sometimes on the same day) and it takes strong, humble, and beautiful men to stand by a woman’s side and love her for all that she is.

We bring different things to the table. Our biology intended for it that way. Men can’t carry babies, no matter how “equal” we want society to be. But instead of overlooking those differences, let’s delve in and love them deeper. Let’s see and honor each other for what we are and the qualities we bring forth, and let’s trust that even softer energies are important.

A dear friend (and incredible life coach) recently told me, upon learning I didn’t have as much time anymore to tend to introspection and self-care:

Wonderful, you’re a nurturing, lactating mother, just what the world needs — feed the world with your milk, drown it in your love!

A metaphor, of course, but it hit right where it needed. I don’t have to “bounce back” from motherhood and into the world of success. I should trust the journey motherhood is taking me on and bring it with me into my work.

A softer approach to doing things, yet stronger and more capable than any version I’ve been before. Like Gaia loves all her creations, I’m also learning to love in new proportions. Still seeking, still questioning, still in great need of support, but with a whole different kind of grounded presence here on Earth.

For today, I’m not just a woman, but a mother. What’s possible next?

Conclusion:

How beautiful that we are so dependent on each other and one another’s unique strengths and qualities. The system wouldn’t work without all of our participation or our admiration for the others’ role to play — now let’s get better at honoring that to its fullest!

As pregnant, I felt stronger and more independent than ever, as if I could somehow take over the world, a feeling that has translated into motherhood. But I also feel this greater need for support from the community around me, unlike I ever have before. For we are truly better together, truly stronger as one. Just as nature intended, I suppose!

So on this International Women’s Day, let’s take a moment to truly celebrate the beautiful and unique qualities we all bring to the table, and in that, let’s start building a world where women get to lead and roar: without fear of our true capabilities and without the need to diminish our powers — our true powers. Let us lead, but let us do so from love. We all will benefit from the world we’ll be creating!