Can Too Much Of A Good Thing Be Bad?

You're over doing it! You're doing too much!

Are familiar phrases I've heard throughout my career as I've played to my strengths to strive at being the best I can be.

Until now I'd thought that to be a positive, but over my morning coffee (something I do excel at) I read a different take - Over doing your strengths!

Huh?

The article explained that in our quest to play to our strengths we can "overdo" them and that made me think.

I regard my tenacity as a core strength.

I'm great at focusing on my goals, determined to achieve, working alone and not taking no for answer. I get sh*t done!

But.......

Taken to extremes, it means that I can find it hard to walk away when a situation evidently isn't working or stubbornly not ask for help when it's definitely needed.

How many times have you been told to "Focus on your strengths?"

As Black Women, being an overachiever is in our blood. It's most often how we've been raised, to be 10x better than our counterparts and that can result in us falling into the " The Super Woman Schema" - our determination to succeed at all costs with often limited resources.

We silently take on huge amounts of work to prove ourselves, we support others to the detriment of ourselves, working away hoping that the powers that be, will notice how hard we're working and reward us. We're great at getting results - if you regularly hear "Give it to {insert your name here}, she'll get it done" then you know what I mean.

Taken to extremes, that can lead to poor boundaries and being taken advantage of to name just a few.

It's not that overdone strengths are bad, the damage happens if they're not recognized or kept in check as they can limit us and keep us trapped in roles we may never have really wanted in the first place.

So....is it time for a little self check?

Reflecting on your strengths and ensuring that you're not overdoing them is an important exercise for personal growth and maintaining balance. The great thing is there are some simple questions you can ask yourself as a self check:

1. Am I neglecting other important areas of my life or skills while focusing too much on my strengths?
2. Are there any negative consequences or unintended outcomes arising from the excessive use of my strengths?
3. Are there situations or contexts where my strengths might not be as effective or appropriate?
4. Am I relying solely on my strengths and avoiding areas where I could improve or develop new skills?
5. Are my strengths overshadowing or dominating others' contributions or perspectives in collaborative settings?
6. Is there a potential for burnout or exhaustion due to constantly relying on my strengths?
7. Am I becoming complacent or resistant to change because of my reliance on my strengths?
8. Are there any feedback or suggestions from others indicating that I may be overdoing my strengths?
9. Am I open to feedback and willing to adapt my approach when necessary, even if it means relying less on my strengths?
10. Do I feel a sense of fulfillment and balance in my life, or am I constantly striving to prove and utilize my strengths?

Remember, the goal is not to diminish or disregard your strengths, but rather to ensure a healthy and well-rounded approach that allows you to grow and evolve in various areas of your life.

So take a few minutes today to review your strengths and make sure you're not over doing them - that's wasted energy!

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