Can I Let This Go?

I have an annoying habit.

Whenever I start something new or have an idea, I start thinking about the worst possible outcome and then put a lot of effort in planning for such an eventuality. Even in the ‘best case’ scenario, for me, it’s well, I’ll see if it works. It’s the ‘if’ in there that’s the kicker. I’m immediately making an assumption the enterprise, whatever it is, isn’t going to, or might not, or probably won’t ‘work’.

These feelings and scenarios have been trained into me since childhood. Parents and teachers and sometimes peers, attempting to prepare a ‘soft landing’ for me in case things shouldn’t work out. By doing so they’re implying my ‘great idea’ or whatever is unworkable or not possible. This is usually because they don’t understand my thinking or my knowledge.

This is still the case, in adult life if people don’t really understand what it is you want to do, or the context of what you want to do, they go into this ‘advisory’ mode. If they have now idea what you’re setting about or how you might be able to do it, the response is it just won’t happen. ‘We’ as a species are inveterate nay sayers. Practically everything we do in our lives today has been described as ‘impossible’ before it was done. It was supposedly impossible to run a mile in less than 4 minutes, but now people do it all the time, just like climbing Everest or sending messages through a wire.

But the strongest enemy to our dreams, plans and ideas is ourselves. After all we believe ourselves more than we believe others, so when we tell ourselves, or just imply in our thoughts and feelings something ‘isn’t going to happen’ we tend to take it on board rather than believing positively in what we are doing or planning to do.

This negative mindset is a guaranteed way of killing off a project or even preventing it from starting in the first place. So what can we do about it?

In the first place we have to ‘notice’ what it is we’re thinking and feeling about what we want to do and as soon as we notice these thoughts use the phrase “Can I let this go?”. Sometimes we need to do this on a ‘scale of 1 to 10’ where 10 is ‘definitely I already have’ and 1 is a low level ‘maybe’ or a ‘yes - but. . .’. As you repeat the question to yourself on a daily basis or mor frequently you’ll move up to the 10 level.

Try it, it works.

There’s something else you can do as well – use EFT otherwise known as ‘tapping’ in a certain way to help you ‘let stuff go’.? It’s an interruptive technique which stops your negative thoughts in their tracks when you’ve tuned into it.

Oh, and there’s something else.

You and I usually attach time based targets to the things we plan to do which can exacerbate the fear of it ‘not happening’. We can use “Can I let this go” to reduce the effect of the target because it’s quite rare an outcome has to be achieved by a specific time and date and those which are usually so well planned and systemised, they more often than not ‘happen’ on the right date. When it isn’t critical or life threatening when it doesn’t complete on a certain date we can ‘let go’ of the date target as fell as the fears of it not happening, doing which is highly likely to reduce them as well.

Book a call with me https://BenCoker.as.me/Clarity if you want to know more