"Can I have permission to shop?"

A client I worked with in January sent me a Whatsapp the other day.?

She said she’d filled an online basket with clothes… and deleted it.?

She hasn’t shopped at all since us working together, when previously she was bordering on compulsive.?

Her wardrobe was FULL of gems, she simply needed some help and support with wearing them, rather than always looking outside for style.?

I'm so proud that she's taken control and is now able to support herself through a situation in which she could have ended up throwing away a lot of money.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again; whether you’re feeling:?

• Sad?
• Angry
• Lonely?
• Frustrated
• Hormonal
• Insecure

… Shopping isn’t a long-term solution.?

BUT. But!!!!!

I know. I have a but! (and like my actual pancake, it has one t not two)

There are times when I absolutely welcome you to shop.?

In fact, researchers think a little bit of shopping every now and then can help with longevity.

My personal permission-slip for a shop?

When it signals an upgrade in your life.

Take my client Sid as an example.

Sid got promoted into leadership, but she felt like an imposter.

And when we got into the why behind those feels... we found she was still dressing in the same clothes she'd had when she graduated.

Despite having considerably more responsibility (and considerably more money), Sid was still walking round with New Recruit Energy.

It was time to swap some of those this-will-do fast fashion items, (which had served her fine but didn't project the correct vibe), for well-considered investment pieces.

Sid is not alone.

Many clients have become the boss, or achieved a certain level of success in business...

But they feel that any second it's going to be snatched away from them.

Why?

They haven't fully stepped into their identity as an expert.

And clothes can absolutely help with that.

Various studies show the link between clothes and behaviour. The term for it is 'enclothed cognition'. In brief, it means we act up to (or down to) the level of behaviour we subconsciously associate with our clothes.

Sometimes, you've just gotta STEP IT UP.

And I can't help you do that if I'm looking in your wardrobe and it's all holey duds, bobbled-to-f* knits, and bras that have lost so much shape they may as well be catapults.

In the case of wanting to go after those big goals of yours, feel fully at ease in your new role as a leader and make the money you deserve...

Permission. To. Shop.

But before you install the Net-a-Porter app on your phone and start adding any shiny object to your basket -

There are some ground rules.

We're shopping for the right pieces. We're shopping to fill the gaps.

Here are my 5 top-tips for buying what you need when it's time for a wardrobe UPGRADE.

1. DON'T shop without a plan

You're going to feel much better rewarded (and be more likely to wear your new purchases), when they're considered.

I know there are stories about an impulse purchase being the 'most special thing that changed the trajectory of a person's wardrobe'... but just like beautiful romances and winning the lottery, these happen rarely.

Don't pin all your outfit hopes on what you might or might not see in the shops.

The best way to ensure you'll wear your new finds is to plan for them.

Firstly, because when you're in the market for something, you prime your brain to spot it.

Secondly, because you'll ensure it's well-worn.

Take some time to go through your current wardrobe based on your new position/goals, and get rid of anything that doesn't align with it.

2. Go in-store?

You will put 25% MORE stuff in your basket when shopping online than in person.?

It's likely to do with the physical act of carrying the items and handing over your debit card when you shop in-store. But perhaps also because in-store you have a chance to try before you buy.

Researchers have also suggested that because online, retailers often have a ‘free shipping over ￡X’ it drives us to buy more.

My biggest reason for going in-store? You can feel the fabric.

There are many a sign to look for when it comes to quality-or-not clothes (you'll want to read next week's instalment for these) - and you can't always see them online.

And even if what you're looking for isn't in-store, if you shop in the right places, they can order to store for you.

3. Cost Per Wear

You know this is about the only kind of equation I'm interested in.

(I'm like Kevin in The Office (US) who's an accountancy whizz when things are put into the context of pies, but can't add two and two if salads, but with shoes)

Price of the item DIVIDED BY number of times worn = Cost Per Wear

If you buy something for ￡20 and wear it twice, your CPW is ￡10.

If you buy something for ￡200 and you REALLY wanted it and you wear it 10 times... the cost per wear is also ￡10. But the likelihood (if you've done your materials research and looked after it well), your ￡200 item will get much more than 10 wears and will be a wardrobe staple for years to come, whereas the ￡20 thing feels throwaway, is likely less well-made and doesn't make it to the end of the season.

4. Think seasonless rather than seasonal

I'm not going to begrudge you a jazzy little on-trend accessory. But if you're wardrobe is full of 'of the moment' pieces, your style will lack cohesion, and it's likely you're missing the foundational pieces to create outfits.

I've seen this many times, and it's grounded in evolution.

Scientists say we are drawn to shine because our ancestors sought water, and the glisten reminds old parts of our brain of that instinct.

How do you spot the difference between flash-in-the-pan and her-for-the-long-haul?

Well it helps to have someone who knows their stuff in your corner. And that's why number 5 is...

5. Work with a professional

Some people have a knack for shopping, really enjoy it and don't need help. And then there are the 99.99% of the rest of the population.

Chances are, if you're looking for a promotion, just got one, or are running a business... you haven't got time to faff about.

Getting dressed to you is already something that's taking up too much brain space (on average, we spend 11 minutes PER DAY deciding what to wear)

In a few hours together, I can help you suss what you need, where to get it and how to wear it, so you no longer feel like the new recruit and instead like an absolute BOSS.

Send me a message to find out more