Calling all influencers and social media users!!

I had an encounter which really got me thinking about safety both online and offline. 

It got me thinking about what I share and who I share it with.

Personally I only use Instagram and LinkedIn. I am familiar with Facebook, Twitter, TikTok, Snapchat etc. I have had accounts on all these platforms, but for one of a number of reasons I have decided to deactivate or delete them entirely.

One huge contributing factor was privacy.

There are so many pros and cons to social media. 

Just recently (November 2020) footage went viral of a male attempting to abduct a young girl in Mitcham, South West London. A passerby sensed something uneasy and decided to film the man and foil his intentions by filming the whole incident and sharing online. I watched the footage and shared the video to assist the campaign of finding the man and bringing him to justice. I felt so grateful for social media when I saw that the man had been arrested and charged.

On the complete flipside, social media influencers, vloggers, content creators (whatever you want to describe it as) post daily about their lives. They share so freely. They share things like:

• What they are up to
• Who they are with
• Where they are going
• Their future plans
• Vulnerabilities/insecurities they have (essentially weaknesses)

They are providing their audience with information. Places to eat, places to go, promoting brands, promoting friends, products etc. Many are motivational, inspirational and encouraging (I’m not referring to the average Love Island contestant here, although kudos to Love Island's Dr Alex George just appointed young mental health ambassador).

Many share their backstory and future life plans, even some YouTubers go as far as sharing their earnings! Surely there needs to be some boundaries and limitations on shared information?

Call me pessimistic, but not everyone in this world is kind. I realised that moreso when working in criminal defence. There are some sadistic people out there. Some that (at times) made me question the integrity of society as a whole. Criminal defence was not for me. Usually if you have been arrested then you deserve to be. One arrest equals so much bureaucracy and who likes paperwork? Certainly not the police officers I know!

There was a time I was extremely cynical and cautious. When you are surrounded by crime everyday, drafting defence case statements, attending the police station and meeting people who had been arrested (who show zero remorse) or lie when the evidence is stacked high against them. It dilutes that optimistic outlook of society. 

Since escaping criminal defence work, I have refuelled on all the positives of people and I am now a magnet for all good things. The people I interacted with were a minority, but when it is your everyday life, it becomes the majority.

The reason I am writing this is because I have an Instagram account, which, until recently was a public profile. I have family who don’t have Instagram profiles (Boomers), so if I wanted to share something with them from my profile then I would usually send them the URL and make my account public so they could access the content. My account therefore often switched from public to private. I didn’t always remember to put it back to private.

To provide some context for this post, I was recently stopped while out walking.

A man kept overtaking me, stopping to take pictures of nature and then continuing, but at a quicker pace than me so he would keep walking past me. After the third time walking past me, he asked how far the pathway extended. I explained that it runs into a little town with some restaurants and shops. He suggested that as we were both walking in the same direction, perhaps we could walk together… (Ok, so you don’t talk to strangers - I know, but in the same breath I have travelled a lot and I would opportunistically look to make friends and talk to people randomly so I didn’t make any prejudices). 

He was about 45, shoulder length grey hair, dressed relatively smart and carried a huge camera. I presumed he was some kind of nature photographer. I didn’t see any major red flags. The end of the pathway didn’t stretch too far and he was going to be walking alongside me either way. 

I made excuses about Covid and maintaining a social distance as I have an elderly friend in my bubble.

He explained to me he was from Switzerland and the conversation was relatively normal. I asked him if he was a photographer and he said - only as a hobby. My brother is a professional photographer, which I shared. He told me that I was in one of his photos, which I wasn’t too sure how to reply to, so I asked if he put them online. He said no. He quickly went on to say he had other hobbies including cycling and hiking, which I love and have recently bought a new bike. I recently uploaded a picture to my Instagram of my bike and a nice view. I am presuming this was a coincidence.

He then asked me if I had visited a specific location and told me it was beautiful. I had been to the location he mentioned a couple of days prior so I also thought this was a coincidence. I didn’t upload the location to my Instagram, but I had shared another location nearby.

I am being deliberately vague of specifics as I want to maintain privacy, but I also want to raise awareness for both online and offline safety.

He exclaims that he is staying at his friend’s apartment. His friend is a Columbian fashion designer. She designs gowns for beauty pageants. He then takes his phone out of his pocket and shows me some pictures of long dresses hung up on hangers in an apartment and scrolls to show me about six floor-length ball gowns. I have no reason to believe he is not telling me the truth, but the conversation is obscure. He said that due to Covid his friend was not able to travel, but she needed photos of the dresses. He had sent her photos on hangers, but his friend had asked him to take some photographs of a girl wearing the dresses so that they could be used in a marketing campaign to sell the dresses to pageant shows.

You can probably guess what was next.

He suggested I wear the dresses. To which I responded, “I am really not the model type, no thank you!" This wasn’t a normal conversation. I was creeped out.

The walkway came to an end and branched out to a square where there were some people, shops and restaurants. I swiftly said, “Well, this is me! Good luck with your search!” And I walked and walked and walked, phoned my friend, sent my location on Whatsapp and didn’t look back. The interaction got me feeling unnerved. 

I made sure my Instagram was set to private. I am hoping the coincidences were just coincidences. But, what if he had seen my Instagram?

There is a little more to these events, but I returned home safely and all is fine.

It really got me thinking about my “followers” - all 812 of them.

Do I know them all? Nope. Do they know me? They know the tiny square that I choose to share.

What I haven’t mentioned is that I think ahead when I share online. Even this post.

As mentioned, my stint working in criminal defence has made me more mindful of unusual characters. I don’t post contemporaneously. Those little squares are not a true depiction of my life. They are mere snippets. I share with friends and family, but not all my followers are friends and family. Some I haven’t had the option to accept, because if your profile is ever set to public then anyone can follow you. 

“Follow” you! That terminology. Creepy huh? Imagine having hundreds and thousands or even millions of “followers”.

I “follow” quite a few Instagram and YouTube influencers. Girls a similar age to me sharing their every move online. At least with YouTube, the content of a vlog is created over a period of days and then shared so there isn’t a live stream. The same cannot be said for an Instagram story or even an Instagram LIVE!

However, vloggers will share habitual behaviours #mymorningroutine which consists of going to the same place for a solo run or swim every morning. Nooo. Please be mindful! Going to the same coffee spot. No again. Don’t be so trusting!! I think there should be limitations or at least lessons on sharing information so freely.

Tell me if I am being too cynical.

I have a (not so) little brother (he's about 6ft4) and he is very selective about what he shares, but his friends, not so much. I question whether their parents know what they are sharing and if they did know, would they be happy about it? No way!

I have recently seen videos from a YouTuber making a vlog about a house move. Documenting all their new gadgets. Declaring that they will share a full house tour when they are all unpacked and settled. Nooo!

I remember when Cribs was on TV - did anyone used to watch that?

“Hi, I’m Really Famous and welcome to my crib!”

It’s a catalogue for criminals.

Opportunists.

Of course, people have alarms and cameras installed, but criminals are advancing. They are able to hack software and disable cameras. This is a thing! Google it! People with electric cars are having their systems rebooted and overridden with new software by tech savvy delinquents.

Influencers!! Not only are you declaring to your “followers” your valuable assets, you are also telling them when you are in Dubai or the Maldives and therefore your home is empty!

There have been celebrities who have lost millions. To name a few famous faces who have been victim to intruders, trespassers, burglaries: Taylor Swift, Chlo? Grace Moretz, Logan Paul, Miley Cyrus, Louis Tomlinson, Harry Styles, Hilary Duff, Kendall Jenner, Selena Gomez. Need I say more?

If big names like these haven’t been able to put adequate security in place then what does this mean for the ever-growing pool of social media influencers? Or even just you and me?

The point of this post is to highlight the drawbacks of contemporaneous posts and sharing. If this makes just one person more mindful about online safety then I will take that as a win. 

As always, I'm open to any discussions and thoughts!