Busting the Feedback Ghost!

Busting the Feedback Ghost!

It is the end of the year, the festive season.... But some of us are having their stress levels getting higher as they think of “End of year appraisals”!

According to HBR “When senior HR executives were asked about their biggest performance management challenge, 63% cited managers’ inability or unwillingness to have difficult feedback discussions.”

Yes, Appraisals are not Feedback. Yet, Appraisals are built on multiple feedback throughout the year. In Appraisal meetings, Feedback conversations are essential together with the end of year evaluation.

Through my work as an Executive Coach, i discovered that anxiety and stress about appraisals are a big challenge to many senior leaders.

In their own words, the?Challenge?is?Giving?the “Negative Feedback” and handling “Difficult Conversations”!

What they discover during Coaching is how their perception of the Appraisals & Feedback is affecting their reaction. Leaders realize that being aware of how they think and feel is the 1st key to managing these conversations. The 2nd key is their awareness of others, and awareness of the atmosphere created.

What do you feel when you hear the word Feedback? What is the perception that is created in your mind? What do you believe is the real purpose of feedback? Is it just “measuring & scoring” or is it “developing and shifting”?

When we perceive Feedback as an Opportunity, and When we create Open Conversations based on deep listening and Empathy, we create Trust and psychological Safety. Meetings become more purposeful and Relational, rather than just transactional.

Let’s remember that we cannot accomplish much from the conversation if the other party is getting emotionally hijacked because they will not be absorbing the message, they will only be reacting to it!

The Leaders’ responsibility is to build this Continuous Learning and Developing Cultures by:

  • Focusing on the main purpose of the performance meetings
  • Being transparent and giving clarity
  • Using a “listening & honoring” rather than a “telling & giving” approach of communication
  • Encouraging the team to perceive the meetings as open conversations

With clarity and trust, conversations will not be as “difficult” anymore.


The Leader’s shift from a pure transactional mindset to an empathetic relational mindset is what creates a transformational experience and allows the receiver to develop and thrive.



Rizwan Kerawala

Helping businesses boost conversions | Digital Experience | Customer Experience | Behaviour Analytics

2 年

A salary increment is just another word for a pay raise. Let’s take you into the technicalities of it as we explore it in this HR glossary.?https://s.peoplehum.com/xpgek

Andrea Stone

Executive Coach & Educator to Global Technology Leaders & Teams | Emotionally Intelligent Leadership | Six Seconds India Preferred Partner

2 年

Thanks Amina Khalifa, PCC - Optimizing Leadership With EQ - great points about listening and honouring and openness and transparency. Feedback shows investment in others - as you say Amina Khalifa, PCC - Optimizing Leadership With EQ, done with empathy, its' a gift.

Insightful tips for feedback

JACK JOHNSON

INTERNATIONAL CONSULTANT. TRAINING that is RELEVANT and INTERESTING, ENGAGES the LEARNER. Working as Associate Trainer

2 年

A good explanation that will prove to be useful to those of us involved with coaching and training. Thank you

Heather Cribbin

High Performance Coach | Mental Performance for Athletes and Executives | Grit & Resilience | Working Internationally

2 年

This is a clear and concise explanation of how all conversations can be transformed using emotions, yours and others, wisely. Thanks for this!

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