Business Vs. Childcare and Chores: How Women Can Balance The Seesaw

The Numbers Tell a Story

Recent government data echo a disappointing trend: working women not only bear the lion’s share of the childrearing in the home they share with their husbands but also the responsibility for most of the house cleaning duties. This unbalanced equation not only persists but continues to gain momentum.

History Played a Significant Role

Part of this phenomenon stems from the “I can have it all” mantra that primarily filled the magazines and the airwaves during the early eighties. Journalist and activist Helen Gurley Brown wrote a seminal book about women being able to have and handle it all and accomplish this multifaceted superhuman feat from scratch.

The premise sounded great. After all, why should powerful women have to choose between their careers or businesses and their love relationships??

When Perception Butted Heads with Harsh Truths

Women were strong, assertive, and confident. They were smart and better educated than ever before. They wanted what they wanted, and nothing stood in their way—except for reality.

While women have shown themselves to be extremely capable business leaders, politicians, doctors, scientists, and other skilled workers in occupations formerly dominated by men, it appears their progress came at an exorbitant price. Along with all this advancement came severe stress and escalating numbers of female alcoholics, prescription and street drug users, heart attack and stroke victims, insomniacs, and mental health patients requiring inpatient and outpatient therapy.

How Did Women End up Here?

The precipitating factors? Like other complex issues, the causes are varied and often cumulative. Lack of financial and other support and firmly entrenched patriarchal societal structures made a female who failed to become Wonder Woman overnight succumb to stress, depression, obesity, and other health issues linked to having inadequate time and resources to indulge in badly needed self-care.

By the time professionally facilitated support, coaching, and meet-up groups began to multiply, many women already felt trapped in the lifestyles they had created. Despite increased prestige and financial rewards, their schedules and tasks demanded far more from them than they anticipated, leaving them feeling lonely, alienated, exhausted, underappreciated, and overwhelmed. Overall decline in the state of their health was inevitable.

Pollsters Agree

A recent Gallup poll showed that the work-and-home-life burdens were exacting more than just mental and physical health tolls.

They cut into business profits like a knife through butter.

Women’s contributions at the workplace matter greatly. Statistics show they can be more effective managers and more engaged workers than men. But in just one year, 3.5 million women abandoned active work.?

A Focus on Documented Problems

They often complain about the lack of opportunities for professional development, recognition for their accomplishments, and feeling that their communications are heard and respected.

Another factor is proximity bias, where people who are located near the workplace are given more authority and respect. Women feel pulled between being there for their daughter’s school plays or doctor’s appointments and submitting a rush project for an important client in-house.

Of course, these issues arise for men, too, but overall they feel and receive more support for attending these extracurricular activities.?

A More Balanced View About Balance

Now about achieving that balance. Just as nothing in life is perfect, there is no perfect balance when women try to juggle their responsibilities. The truth is that no one can do it all. That is a myth that, when dispelled, allows people to reassert their existence as communal beings who need each other’s information, support, and companionship.

So what should they do if they feel hopelessly trapped on a work-to-home-to-work treadmill?

Holistic Perspectives to Save the Day

Corporations must evolve their thinking, but the truth is, so must the women. Increasingly inclusive work environments won’t solve everything.

There is much work to be done to help women return to a healthier, more balanced lifestyle by beginning with a stronger sense of self—an identity divorced from what they do and what they have and focused instead on their identity as inherently worthy and priceless human beings.

A Look at a Few Solutions

1. Women not only need to communicate and advocate for more support at home, flexible workplace arrangements, and recognition for their accomplishments, which they should record meticulously, but they also need to abandon their quest to be the superwoman, superwife, and super childcare expert.
2. They need to adopt regular self-care regimens that allow more vacations, breaks, and downtime. If necessary, they should seek coaching, psychological counseling, or career counseling to explore more options.
3. And they need to forgive themselves for any mistakes made along the way as they transition to a healthier lifestyle that includes an improved diet, better sleep hygiene, exercise, and meditation. They may be gifted and capable, but they are, after all, human.

?Want a break from the treadmill? A stress reduction session does wonders. Let's talk about it. Just click on this link to start a complimentary and confidential conversation. You deserve it.

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