Burned OUT!

Navigating Burnout: Recognizing the Signs and Finding Your Way Forward

Burnout doesn’t announce itself with a grand gesture. It creeps in slowly, whispering doubts and stealing your joy. As someone who’s been on the frontlines of ambition—a Black woman in tech, a daughter of immigrants, an eldest child, and a fierce advocate for equity—I know the weight of trying to be everything to everyone. I’m not here to define burnout for you because you already feel it. Instead, let’s talk about how to recognize it, and more importantly, how to deal with it in real, meaningful ways.

The Signs of Burnout

1. Physical and Emotional Exhaustion: You wake up tired. You go to bed tired. It’s like your body is carrying a weight no one else can see.
2. Cynicism and Detachment: That spark you used to feel? It’s dimmed. You question the point of it all.
3. Reduced Performance: The tasks you once nailed now feel impossible.
4. Feeling Isolated: Sitting in meetings where you’re the only one who looks like you can feel lonely. Being the “only” is exhausting.
5. Emotional Numbness: You’ve stopped feeling. Happiness, sadness, everything in between—it’s all muted.
6. Persistent Self-Doubt: “Am I good enough?” That question loops in your mind.
7. Chronic Stress: Your shoulders ache, your stomach churns, and your heart races. It’s as if your body is in a constant state of alert.
8. Physical Symptoms: Headaches, stomachaches, and fatigue become your daily companions.
9. Feeling Trapped: Whether it’s finances, work, or family, you feel like there’s no way out.
10. Hopelessness About the Future: I’ll never forget a conversation with my niece. She looked at me and said, “I don’t think I’ll ever own a home.” Her words broke my heart. She is still in high school looking at her future.

Burnout in Context for me, Anne Marie....

Being a Black Woman in Tech

Let me tell you, being the “only” in a room is exhausting. You work twice as hard for half the recognition, all while navigating spaces that often don’t feel built for you. And now, with companies stepping away from their performative allyship, the burden feels even heavier. Here’s the truth: your presence matters. You belong. And when it feels like too much, lean into your community. Find strength in collective resilience.

Being the Daughter of Immigrants

Growing up, I watched my parents sacrifice so much for the promise of a better future. Now, as the narrative around immigrants shifts, it’s hard not to feel the weight of their sacrifices in a country that seems to have forgotten its promise. Was the American Dream a reality or just accessible by a limited certain few?

But let me tell you this: you are their legacy. Celebrate their journey, honor their resilience, and remember that you carry their dreams forward.

The Eldest Child with Aging Parents

As the eldest, you’re the fixer, the one everyone leans on. But who do you lean on? Caring for aging parents while managing your own life is a delicate balance. Remember, it’s okay to take a break. Boundaries aren’t walls; they’re fences that protect your peace.

Rising Costs and Generational Fears

When my niece shared her fears about never owning a home, I saw a reflection of the systemic inequities we’re all grappling with. The rising cost of everything isn’t just a financial burden; it’s an emotional one. These moments remind me that we need to fight for change while also equipping the next generation with tools to navigate this reality.

Finding Your Way Forward

1. Set Boundaries: Learn to say no. Protect your energy like it’s the precious resource it is.
2. Seek Professional Help: Therapy isn’t a last resort—it’s a powerful tool.
3. Reframe Challenges: Instead of seeing everything as a burden, view it as a chapter in your story of resilience.
4. Create Joy Rituals: Whether it’s a morning tea ritual or a weekly dance party in your living room, find joy and hold onto it.
5. Advocate for Change: Burnout isn’t just personal; it’s systemic. Use your voice to push for equity and inclusion in every space you occupy.

Burnout doesn’t define you.

It’s a signal that something needs to change.

By recognizing the signs and taking intentional steps, you can move through it with grace and strength.

Remember, in a world that demands so much from us, taking care of yourself isn’t just an act of survival—it’s an act of revolution.