Bullying, Lateral Violence, Mobbing: Tips on Supporting People at Work who are Targeted.

Tips for colleagues, peers, friends, and family:?

• Do you know how important you are??
• Did you know that you can help with or without getting involved??
• Did you know that you have the power to create positive changes in the workplace??
• Did you know you can help promote psychological safety for all workers, including new hires??You can impact the future workplace experiences of your children and grandchildren, too!

We know there are many valid reasons for witnesses wishing to remain silent. Our trauma-informed training teaches about these reasons to help witnesses, leaders, HR, unions, investigators, and employees learn what people can do safely and confidently. Until things change in the work world, making you confident in the workplace reporting structure, we want to help you process what is stopping you, offer you safety, respect, and support, and help you learn what you can do.?

Here are some tips for peers, friends, and family:?

It is crucial to let someone bullied or harassed know that their experience has been witnessed or acknowledged and that their situation is unacceptable. Providing validation is a vital support in such cases. Anyone can confirm that the targeted employee's bullying experience goes against legislation and the organization's policies, reminding them of their rights and where they can seek support. It is worth noting that people do not have to witness an event to offer words of validation. For instance, say, "I did not see what happened, but just from listening, I can imagine this must have been terrible for you. Anyone can safely say, "I am sorry this happened to you. Is there anything I can do to help?"

When offering support, colleagues, peers, friends, or family must make promises they can keep. Those targeted already feel betrayed. Support can be offered in creative ways that do not exacerbate feelings of betrayal. Though people may have valid reasons for not wanting to get directly involved, it would be very helpful to the injured worker if they would be transparent about this. Transparency will benefit all parties, e.g.,??

• Transparency about a reluctance to speak up will decrease the "pain of the unknown," and the resulting risks of secondary injury, e.g., silence and avoidance, become further betrayal. ?
• Peers who decide it is in their best interest to remain silent will experience less guilt or shame.?

If someone decides they cannot become directly involved, they can commit to documenting what they have witnessed to remain ethical and maintain their dignity and integrity.

Their circumstances will likely change, and their documentation will become vital to any actions they choose. Documentation is vital not only for the targeted employee but for themselves. Please continue reading the following before deciding whether to document and what actions are best.?

Documenting is beneficial for their mental health:?

• Documentation Maintains Clarity?-It is important to keep documentation of any workplace bullying experiences a colleague, peer, or other supporter may have encountered. With busy workdays, personal lives, and other distractions, it is easy to forget the details of such experiences. Maintaining the writer's clarity by using documentation ensures that the writer can confidently recall the experience in the future.?
• Protect Self-Confidence:??Documentation will?protect one's confidence?in cases of workplace bullying, where a person's self-esteem is constantly under attack.?A person or group who abuses their power over another typically counts on forgetfulness, vague recall, and lack of self-confidence to stand up for what is right.?
• Builds Courage:?Reporting abuse in the workplace can be daunting, and it takes much courage to do so. It is crucial to have a clear understanding of the details that support and protect one's confidence to avoid self-doubt, ruminating thoughts, and sleep disturbance.?Clarity and confidence build the courage?to report abuse ethically, competently, and confidently.?
• Consistency and Credibility: Consistency and credibility are crucial when reporting workplace abuse. It is essential for everyone involved, including leaders, HR, colleagues, peers, and unions, to support the submission of detailed documentation to ensure that all incidents are appropriately recorded and addressed. Consistently documenting experiences sends a clear message of credibility to leaders and workplace investigators.

Lastly, if the target fears for their safety, staying with them until additional support arrives is essential.

Talk to a trusted and knowledgeable family member, friend, colleague, or a Psychological Safety Consultant. It is essential that you are not judged or shamed and feel safe processing your barriers to reporting abuse. This is the only way to find solutions so that you will take steps you feel right about when it is the right time for you.

A Few Examples of Many Valid Reasons for Not Reporting:

• Overwhelmed with work while balancing a personal life crisis.
• Witness has observed the process of reporting fail time and time again.
• They do not know what to do. Note: training will fix that!
• They have reported in the past and become the bullies' next target.
• Trust, safety, and respect are all gone.

These are valid, and there are solutions to remove these barriers safely!

Let's change the narrative about witnesses and offer support to make it safe and suitable for them to come forward! Many will want to do the right thing; they must figure out their fears, resistance, and reactions, so let's help them do that.

Feel free to contact us for more information on our services e.g.,

• Trauma-informed workplace consultations for leaders, HR, investigators, safety, unions, and groups or individual staff.
• Trauma-informed training: customized for all levels of staff and to meet the needs of each workplace or community.
• Individual services - risk assessments, injury assessments, coaching, education, advocacy, and counseling.

[email protected]

www.instituteofworkplacebullyingresources.ca

Linda Crockett MSW, RSW, SEP, CPPA