Bullying

Bullying is an adverse behavior that may leave emotional scars in victims’ lives. It empowers the aggressor’s feelings of power, hate, and anger. At the same time, it decreases self-esteem, confidence, and peace of mind in the bullied. This form of aggression can be physical, verbal, or social and aims to cause harm repetitively (Lee, 2021). Under the pseudonym, John, a thirty-five-year-old man, shared his experience as a victim of bullying to illustrate this subject better.

He was bullied for the first time when he was ten-year-old in fourth grade. He did not tell any adult—including his parents—about his situation, nor did anything to stop it until he burst out of anger and despair. According to John, the bully was bigger and stronger than him; however, other students’ support made him even more intimidating. John’s remarkable recollection of the events suggests bullying can highly affect victims, often making those memories painfully unforgettable.

Bullying is a complex issue without an unequivocal definition or federal law that punishes it. According to Slattery et al. (2019), the definition of bullying is not consistent due to the different forms in which it can manifest. It can be defined as physical/direct, verbal, aggressive behavior, social aggression, and virtual, to mention a few. In contrast to the Federal legislation, Florida prohibits bullying. The state legislation defines as “‘Bullying’” includes cyberbullying and means systematically and chronically inflicting physical hurt or psychological distress on one or more students and may involve teasing, social exclusion, threat, intimidation, stalking, physical violence, theft, sexual, religious, or racial harassment, public or private humiliation, or destruction of property (Slattery et al., 2019). Not having a specific definition might make it harder for students, teachers, and the general public to call out bullying when it happens.

John was ten years old when he experienced bullying for the first time. It began when Chase, a classmate, became continually aggressive towards him with no apparent reason in fourth grade. Chase was tall and strong despite being a ten-year-old like John. He would constantly make fun of John and throw objects at him. On the other hand, John never expressed his emotions and frustration to any adult—including his parents—fearing being labeled a snitch. Instead, he internalized his anger and frustration, which affected his learning experience at school.

Conversely, Chase became more aggressive as time passed. He probably soon learned there was a low probability that John would fight back or that adults could reprimand him. Classmates further contributed to the bully’s actions. Nobody tried to stop Chase. John remembers most of them would laugh or looked away every time Chased attacked him. A month passed before John acted. Chase kept poking him with the sharp edge of a pencil until John fought back, and both had to go to the Principal’s office. The school official made them sit together in every single class for the rest of the year. They were required to walk together to class, recess, and the lunchroom. Such intervention ended up with a seemingly positive outcome; both children ultimately became friends. However, John’s psychological scars seemed latent as the discomfort was evident while he shared his story.

Control, helplessness, and bystander effect are common behaviors during bullying. Chase probably knew he had an advantage over John, who was smaller than him. Perhaps, he wanted to demonstrate control and power over his peers. Clark et al. (2019) suggested that children who engage in bullying often seek a higher social status when their peers accept them. Chase might have assumed his social status increases when he entertains many, even at the expense of another peer. In other words, a group of students’ approval might be enough reason for the behavior to continue. ?

The bullied, like John, are often left perplexed by the situation and often do not know how to resolve the issue. The side effects might be mild or severe depending on the gravity of the experience. According to Lee (2021), victims may negatively internalize their situation, leading to depression and anxiety. In extreme cases, they may ultimately commit suicide. Thus, it is essential to teach children how to handle those situations regardless of the assumed consequences. Often, other students assist in bullying even if they think they are doing nothing wrong. Clark et al. (2019) explained bystander students encourage the bully by aiding him or expressing direct or indirect approval of the aggression. In other words, bullying often becomes a social affair that thrives with the consent of others.

Adults constantly try to find a solution to this problem without acknowledging they are the source of the issue. Adults—including teachers and professionals—approve and encourage bullying others for their political views. Unfortunately, it happens on both sides of the aisle. Aren't adults supposed to be role models? yet, even the most respected encourage such behavior against those they disagree with. Perhaps, if most people looked at their behavior and social media interactions they would acknowledge they are responsible for the bullying epidemic in schools.

Bullying is detrimental to people’s mental health and society. It is rooted in the satisfaction of causing pain through repetitive aggression, fueled by the positive social response and little to no push back from the bullied. The bully often feels powerful and in control of the situation. Conversely, the victim’s mental health may significantly deteriorate, leading to depression and even suicide. John’s case demonstrates that often victims do not know how to handle the situation and do not seek help until it is too late. His experience also suggests that even mild cases of bullying can linger in victims’ memories decades later. In short, bullying affects victims significantly during and even years after the aggression.

Gabby Franco

References

Clark, K. N., Dorio, N. B., Demaray, M. K., & Malecki, C. K. (2020). Understanding Bullying, Victimization, and Bystander Behaviors Through Resource Control Theory. Child & Youth Care Forum, 49(4), 489–510. https://www.researchgate.net/publication/338027998_Understanding_Bullying_Victimization_and_Bystander_Behaviors_Through_Resource_Control_Theory

Lee, J. (2021). Pathways from Childhood Bullying Victimization to Young Adult Depressive and Anxiety Symptoms. Child Psychiatry & Human Development, 52(1), 129–140. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32367195/

Slattery, L. C., George, H. P., & Kern, L. (2019). Defining the word bullying: Inconsistencies and lack of clarity among current definitions. Preventing School Failure, 63(3), 227–235. https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/1045988X.2019.1579164?journalCode=vpsf20