A Bullying Boss is a Bad Boss

Some people misguidedly believe that being tough, aggressive, or even bullying is a sign of strong leadership. However, true leadership is about inspiring and empowering others, not berating them.

Earlier this year, Janice Omadeke, PMP and I discussed workplace bullying and she shared a story from her early career, where she witnessed a VP of communications regularly screaming at and berating a communications manager. This behavior was tolerated by HR because the VP was seen as good for the bottom line.

But, as I've written previously , it's better to have a hole on your team than and a**hole. The narrow view that protects the 'brilliant jerk ' fails to account for the true costs of bullying, which includes:

• Reduced productivity: When people are yelled at or berated, they go into "fight or flight" mode. This makes it difficult to process information or do their best work.
• Increased turnover: Bullied employees are likely to leave, increasing hiring and training costs — from 50-250% of the annual salary of each lost employee.
• Damaged morale: Bullying doesn't just affect the target — it creates a toxic atmosphere for the entire team.
• Lost potential: Instead of developing employees' skills and confidence, bullying crushes their spirit and motivation.

When you account for all of these factors, that good-for-the-bottom-line VP looks exactly like what they are — a bullying costing your organization time, talent, and money .

Bullying is Not a Leadership Attribute

Good leaders understand that their role is to build up their team members, not tear them down. As Janice shared, "My job is to build my team. When they go off to their next job, I want them to be stronger, more impactful professionals than when they joined."

Optimize for collaboration vs. coercion by:

• Creating a psychologically safe environment where people can do their best work.
• Giving clear, actionable feedback to help employees improve.
• Recognizing and developing the unique talents of each team member (honoring individuality instead of demanding conformity).
• Modeling respectful communication, even during disagreements.
• Building trust through consistent, ethical behavior.

Leaders who resort to bullying often do so out of their own insecurity or lack of more effective leadership skills. Organizations should invest in leadership development and create accountability systems to prevent and address bullying behavior to create environments where both people and performance thrive. Learn more >

The only way to stop bullying is to create negative consequences for the person doing the bullying. Only when bullying stops giving them some sort of advantage will bullies alter their behavior.

Radical Respect is a weekly newsletter I am publishing on LinkedIn to highlight?some of the things that get in the way of creating a collaborative, respectful working environment. A healthy organization is not merely an absence of unpleasant symptoms. Creating a just working environment is about eliminating bad behavior and reinforcing collaborative, respectful behavior. Each week I'll offer tips on how to do that so you can create a workplace where everyone feels supported and respected. Learn more in my new book Radical Respect , available wherever books are sold! You can also follow Radical Candor? and the Radical Candor Podcast more tips about building better relationships at work.